tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-375568622024-03-14T12:01:26.564+05:30NacreRamyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.comBlogger123125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-29663535727611397232023-11-19T04:26:00.012+05:302024-01-22T12:38:59.076+05:30the birthday post - 36<p><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">36! </span></p><span id="docs-internal-guid-c199df76-7fff-18e2-2267-d9f0889d9999"><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">The years are going by so fast, I’m trying to keep up. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I hope the years go slower and slower from now on. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I want to craft and live a life that is rich, authentic and abundant. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">But most importantly I want to craft my life with clarity, intent and fearlessness. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I hope I feel triumphant every November, rather than wondering what on earth I did all year. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">This year I spent over 6 months nursing a broken thumb – months that kept me off drawing, writing and playing the piano –</span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;"> things I loved doing most. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">It was an interesting lesson in patience. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">It was my first (and fascinating) experience of watching a piece of my body crack and magically self-heal.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">How powerful, our bodies. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">It was during this time that I turned to the “do the bare minimum” phenomenon. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">You know, those “just get work done, just get through the day” kind of days. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’ve had plenty of days like those this year. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Initially I felt pretty good. Watching mindless TV was just that – mindless </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">– </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">a relief from having to work my brain. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">But soon I didn’t really like it.</span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I like doing stuff. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I like doing things that give my life meaning. Writing, drawing, music, reading, swimming, walking. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Of course, you can choose anything and declare that it will give your life meaning. Free for all. Pick anything and hang on to it for dear life. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">But not just one, choose 2 or 3 things you think will give your life meaning. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">One needs options. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><br /></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’ve decided that volunteering to make the world a better place isn’t necessarily superior to watching a movie in your free time. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Because in the end it’s about what makes YOU feel sane and happy and that’s the only thing that matters, the only thing within your control, the only thing that will make a difference to people around you. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">So how does it matter whether you get there by watching mindless TV or by swimming or by producing a piece of art? </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Plus, you know: In the end, nothing matters. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">When I say “the end” I mean not just the end of the world, but that of many worlds, of many universes, the length of time the human brain can barely conjure up. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">That’s what I think anyway. How can anyone prove otherwise? Who knows what will happen in the future and if even human existence is of any consequence in the large (very large) picture? </span></p>That's why it's important to identify things that will give our lives meaning. </span><div><span><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Isn’t it amazing that the whole world is just a product of our brains? </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">The biggest gift a human being can have is the gift of cognition, this beautiful, beautiful gift of being able to think, remember, perceive. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br /></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’m baffled by the number of pictures people take of themselves taking pictures of themselves. Why are there so many pics of people taking their own selfies? </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br /></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">A highlight of this year was watching lugworm squiggles on the beach (look it up if you don’t know what it is! Amazing stuff.). </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Other highlights were walking through wildflower meadows, taking a dip in a very cold waterfall, and watching a glacier from a train through Norwegian mountains. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I hope I’m always excited by natural wonders, wherever I am. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I hope I never lose enthusiasm for the smallest of things. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">This year, I got to connect with a lovely person online who’s translating my work into French. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">A serendipitous meeting! Who knows where this will go? I'm just going to enjoy the journey! </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’m grateful that my work has brought me in contact with so many incredible people all over the world who’ve connected with me both online and offline. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Human connections matter. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">What are we here for if not for each other? </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Funny/interesting things I heard this year: </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">“Oh you are married?! Oh your husband is at work now? That’s great. Men should work. Women should go on holiday. Hahaha.” - </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">Bulgarian cab guy who was driving me to the airport. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">"One version we project at one point cannot be a constant… we keep growing and changing with different experiences." – Friend, about me worrying what someone at work thought of me. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">"That’s okay, our interests and ideas evolve..." – </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">Mother-in-law, when I said I’m no longer sure I like drawing comics. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">"There are lots of people who have kids and are happy. There are lots of people who have kids and are unhappy. And vice versa. Your happiness doesn't depend on whether you have kids." </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif"><span style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">–</span></span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;"> my mom.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">"We will start a family fund for your creative business." </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif"><span style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">–</span></span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;"> my incredibly supportive dad. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif"><span style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">"I think you should become a full-time travel writer." </span></span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">–</span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;"> my long-suffering partner who has trudged along on many of my sudden trips. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br /></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">This year, I’ve had people visit me with no agenda but to simply spend time with me. It was the most flattering, most amazing feeling in the world! How lucky am I! </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I got to reconnect with a lot of old friends this year, and I am so bloody grateful for that. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Given a few hours to myself in a new city, I am likely to: go for a hike, watch sunrise/sunset, go to a bookshop/library, find a park/zoo/botanic garden. Highly unlikely to visit a museum or historical buildings or do any kind of audio tour (I am terrified of them!). </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">To be in the company of living things makes me feel peaceful. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I miss India more and more by the day. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’d love to see and know more of India </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">– </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">from Zuari to Zanskar. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">One day I want to travel across India and write a comic book about its beautiful people and places. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I am so proud to have had the unique and diverse range of influences I’ve had through my 35 years of life so far </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">–</span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;"> musically, literary, artistically, linguistically, visually... all the allys. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I used to feel really embarrassed as a kid that I couldn’t converse on politics and cricket </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">– </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">two topics that seemed to dominate most adult conversations. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">But today I’m so proud of having been different, that I know exactly what a min7add9 chord sounds like or how to use salt in watercolours. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br /></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">It’s time we stopped feeling guilty for who we are. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">It’s time we stopped overcompensating for who we are or who we’re not. (#notetoself) </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">My favourite lyrics in the world are Seek Up by the Dave Matthews Band. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">“<i>Forget about being guilty we are innocent instead. For soon we will all find our lives swept away…</i>” </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I love dragonflies. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I love swimming. Oh, I do love swimming. It makes me feel relieved, confident, at home. </span></p><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div>I love Punjabi food. </div></span></span><div><span><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I love spending time with kids. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I've started to really love cooking. A highlight of this year has been regularly making my mom's melt-in-mouth rotis. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Nice to have many things to love. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">One needs options. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br /></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I regret that I’ve become a more closed person. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’m cautious about what I say and to whom. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I don’t really like this person that much. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I was happier when I was saying and doing things without thinking much, even though it led to much judgement and led to my cautiousness in the first place. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I was often called fickle and indecisive due to my frequently changing career choices. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">But I think I had enormous amounts of strength to make decisions, to identify and eliminate what wasn’t a good choice for me. Way better than sticking to a bad option knowing it was a bad option and being miserable. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><br /></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I think we unnecessarily revere the idea of stability and steadfastness. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Things need to be fluid, there needs to be space to evolve, the boat needs to be rocked. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">One needs options. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I dread being static, fixed, tied down. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I don’t want to ever be in a place where I feel life is just about work and watching some stuff on TV after.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I want to be like a river, meandering, finding new ground, creating patterns, ready to do anything. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I don’t really like my comics.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’ve always thought of myself as a writer. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Comics still feel like a medium where I’m struggling to match what I envision to what I end up producing. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I would like to think and draw stuff beyond stick figures.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’m really keen to explore what my style as an illustrator is – beyond the minimalism and line drawings. Will I make pretty dainty watercolours? Will I paint large dramatic art canvases? Will I used mixed media or gouache? Who knows. I’m going to find out next year. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’d like to be an illustrator. That’s a good option. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I started to play the bass guitar this year. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">A complete lack of discipline prevents me from doing anything real with it, but hey, it’s good to have the option to be a bassist one day. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br /></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">We’ve had friends and family over every month this year. It’s been all kinds of delightful to cook up warm meals and have all these happy laughing faces at home. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I think I'm getting closer to my dream of being a <a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/CvIGJIqokAl/?img_index=1" target="_blank">Great Indian Aunty</a>. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><br /></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I like being myself in these posts.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I wonder if people judge me after reading these posts. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">But then I remember, everyone’s too busy getting photographed while taking selfies. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Somedays I feel like the relentless positivity I had in my twenties has been replaced by a sharp cynicism. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">But thankfully those moments are short-lived. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I have to say that I have a deep rooted fear of cynicism. I indulge it whole-heartedly once in a while, but I would hate to turn permanently to the Dark Side. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">So I try to keep myself in check. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-position: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">This year I've learned to accept myself, even the bits of me that I dislike. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif"><span style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">When I look in the mirror I find that I'm decidedly a big fat NOT BAD. </span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif"><span style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">I will say goodbye to guilt and hello to self-appreciation. </span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif"><span style="white-space-collapse: preserve;"><br /></span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif"><span style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">When you can be who you truly are, you can do anything. </span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif"><span style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">There are so many options. </span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif"><span style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">And one always needs options. </span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="white-space-collapse: preserve;">With that, I conclude my wise words and get busy being 36. </span></p></span></div></div>Ramya Sriramhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05341916424439858652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-32762255443780501352023-10-06T11:41:00.007+05:302023-11-19T04:29:06.862+05:30the birthday post - 35<p><span style="font-family: verdana; white-space-collapse: preserve;">35!</span></p><span id="m_-3628266023862467388gmail-docs-internal-guid-2bb742a6-7fff-0240-36b5-7d2f93643ccc" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: verdana; font-size: small;"><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">What a nice number. Feels like a destination. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’ve been warned that this is when I’m going to have a midlife crisis. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">That’s funny because I’ve already finished having my midlife crisis. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">In fact, I seem to have a life crisis every year. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I quite enjoy having them – I’d be alarmed if I didn’t. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">All my life I’ve been an explorer. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’ve been lucky enough to explore mountains and forests and waterfalls and fields. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">But what has always thrilled me is exploring how people think, what goes on in their heads, how they interpret life and love and purpose and meaning. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I get a kick out of having the smallest opportunity to look into someone’s mind. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">It’s a real privilege. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">This year, I had the opportunity to explore my own head. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">It was a terrifying and rewarding experience. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’ve always thought that you can’t possibly know someone else entirely. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">But now I think that there’s no way I will know myself entirely. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’m barely scratching the surface. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"></span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’ve undergone possibly the biggest revamp of my personality since I was 19. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I feel like someone’s reached inside me and pulled out my guts and soul and heart and mind and prodded them, squeezed them, juggled with them, tap-danced on them, then arranged them differently, and put them all back in<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"> with an evil laugh. </span><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"></span> </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">What fun. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I don’t know if the new configuration will work yet but I’ll find out soon. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"></span></span><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: black; white-space-collapse: preserve;"></span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: black; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I did eight months of therapy this year</span><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: black; white-space-collapse: preserve;">: the greatest gift I've given to myself. </span><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: black; white-space-collapse: preserve;"></span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: black; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: black; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"></span><br /></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"></span>I started the year by quitting everything: my full-time job, my part-time job, a contract job. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Clearly those were too many jobs to handle. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Human capacity is unfortunately finite. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">But I’ve realized over time that quitting is an art too.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">It’s not a sign of failure. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">On the contrary, quitting something has always spelled victory for me. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Knowing when to stop is an art. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Just like you ideally don’t want to overcook a dish or overwater a garden or overstuff a piece of music, you ideally don’t want to stick around in a situation that no longer serves you. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">You don’t have to kill yourself to get to the top of a mountain when you could be enjoying a packet of crisps sitting on a rock by a waterfall halfway up. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’ve tried and tested that. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">As I grow older, I increasingly feel like there are some important things we don’t learn as kids, which we should. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">One of the glaring gaps is<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"> life skill lessons is</span> “How to Think”. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I think this should be a special subject in itself. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">How to Think: a mandatory module taught by scientists, artists, writers, engineers, entrepreneurs, innovators, problem-solvers, roadside vendors, working parents, stay at home parents, believers, non-believers, etc.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">And what about How to Deal with Conflict? That stuff really matters. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">And survival books? </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">More than how to survive on an island, I think we need material on How to Survive in Society. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">How to survive right here, right now, <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">not j</span><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"></span>ust in some far-fetched situation. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Or maybe everyone’s cracked this and it’s just me! </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Anyway.<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"> </span>Th<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">e </span><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"></span>whole series <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">of books will be packaged nicely and</span> called How to Life. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Yes, <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">How to </span>Life<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"> not how to live</span>.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">Life.</span> A How-to. <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">I wish I had had this manual while growing up. </span></span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Like millions of women in India and across the world, I have been inappropriately groped in public (and private) spaces as a child, a teenager, and an adult. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">A friend of mine from another country who lived in India for a long time remarked, “If you accumulate bad karma over and over and over again, you know what happens?” I asked what, and he said, “You’ll be born as a woman in India.” </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">It made me cry. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I realised what it meant to be a fearless woman when I walked on an empty street in Oslo and swam by myself in a lake in the middle of a forest.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’ve travelled alone plenty of times but for some reason, this was so special. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">It was just me and the lake and the trees and the sky. Highlight of the year. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I think I’m a closet hippie and a wild rebel trapped in a mind that often<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">, much to my annoyance,</span> seeks social acceptance.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Such conflict. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Wow, the things I’ve started to reveal in these posts. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">People keep telling me </span>that I’m brave to share so much of my personal stuff online<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">. </span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">B</span>ut to be honest I don’t feel brave at all. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I don’t fear it so it doesn’t make me brave to do it. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I find myself being a misfit in society more often than I’d like to admit. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">How to Survive as <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">a </span>Misfit in Society. Special edition. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I don’t care what people think about my comics, which often reflect my deepest thoughts, but I agonize over how many exclamation marks I use in work emails, whether I’ve talked too much in my first meeting with a potential friend, whether I’ve been rude in a Whatsapp message without intending to. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I seem to be anxious about the small stuff and<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"> reasonably</span> chilled out about the big stuff. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Swimming helps immensely with anxiety. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Ah, swimming. It saved me this year. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Just that movement. Gliding, pulling, gliding, pulling. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">This year I swam in open waters. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">What a feeling to float on your back under a great big sky! </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Interesting things I heard this year: </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><br /></span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><br /></span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">“You’ll get there faster by going slower.” </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: #4d5156; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">–</span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> a woman I met during a solo trip to Cornwall. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">“I’d like to be as self-unaware as possible.” </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: #4d5156; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">–</span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> a friend, after therapy. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">“I want to go to London one day just to see how there are so many people in one place, like people go to zoos to see animals.” </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: #4d5156; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">–</span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> a<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"> girl from Lapland,</span> who’d grown up in the forest<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">, with reindeer and pine trees for friends. </span> </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">“It’s always worth spending money for mental peace.” </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: #4d5156; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">–</span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> my wise partner. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">“I’m so proud of you.” </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: #4d5156; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">–</span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> my mom, on a couple of occasions this year. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">“Don’t worry<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">yyyy!</span> <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">Y</span>ou can practise and get better.” </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: #4d5156; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">–</span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> a friend’s 4 year old daughter, who was <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">trying to be kind about my bad dancing to her fav Frozen songs. </span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">“Even though I didn’t understand it, I had faith in us and knew that we would figure it out.” </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: #4d5156; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">–</span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"> <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">a</span> friend<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">, </span>after we had to Deal with Conflict. </span><br /></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">“<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">It's not your fault. </span>The brain will always want to protect you and keep you safe.” </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="color: #4d5156; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">– </span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">my therapist<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">. </span><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"></span><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"></span><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"></span></span><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><br /><br /></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Nowadays I’m much more guarded, less willing to trust, and more careful about my Resourc<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"></span>e Usage. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I told a friend very proudly about my progress on this front. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I declared that I was going to be cherry-picky about what I gave to whom. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">He looked at me and said, “But you’re you. You love and trust without boundaries. That’s who you are.” </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Hmmmm. That struck a chord. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">One of my favourite movies is Kiki’s Delivery Service, which I’ve watched many many times. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I used to think it’s about growing up. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I rewatched it and realized that it’s about independence.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Then I rewatched it and <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">figured </span>that it’s actually about loneliness. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Then I saw it again and realized that it’s about burnout! </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">You know that moment when Jiji stops talking to Kiki? </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">That moment has been this full year for me. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">But, like Kiki, I managed to sit my butt on my broom and make it work. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Cheers to the unbearable lightness of inescapable adulthoo<span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">d. </span></span></p><p style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">The greatest lesson I've learned in my 35 years of life is that Stuff Has To Get Done</span>. </span></p><p style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="tahoma, sans-serif"><span class="gmail_default"></span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">This year has been all about Setting Boundaries. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I went to my therapist with a very well-thought out list of all the things I <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">didn't</span> want to be. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I wanted to be a New Person. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Example: </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Does not want to be: people pleaser, second guesser, averse to change</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Wants to be: uninhibited, self-assured, fearless, free </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I was so silly, I thought I could become a whole new person <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">just by</span> ticking boxes off a list. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Oh well, we live and learn. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">35 years of living and learning!! </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I don’t feel bad at all about growing old. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I feel quite good actually. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I understand things better, I have met more non-like-minded people, I have listened to more amazing music, read amazing writing, had even more good food, had more interesting conversations, deepened some relationships, let go of some, been anchored by the people who matter most, and have hopefully <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">served as an anchor too. </span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">That's a lot in a short period of time. </span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif"></span>Ha. A bargain! </span><br /></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><br /></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">The biggest victory this year has been that I like myself. </span></p><p style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">Like, I really like myself – the full package – insecurities and cellulite and greying hair and pre-coffee grumpiness... even a little bit of the people-pleasing and second-guessing. </span><br /></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Why, I <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">might even say that I'm beautiful. </span></span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Here’s to another year of living and learning and having my guts and heart and soul and mind rearranged in a new configuration. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">I’ll find ways to love that person, whoever she <span class="gmail_default" face="tahoma, sans-serif">turns </span>out to be. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span face="Tahoma, sans-serif" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space-collapse: preserve;">Happy next year to me. </span></p></span>Ramya Sriramhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05341916424439858652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-18296561328954027332021-11-19T06:11:00.007+05:302021-11-19T13:00:16.001+05:30the birthday post - 34 <div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="60b5h-0-0" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="60b5h-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="60b5h-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="60b5h-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span style="font-family: verdana;">34!</span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="2v7qu-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="2v7qu-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="2v7qu-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Another year, and I’m still brave (or stupid) enough to keep writing these posts. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="8ca7b-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="8ca7b-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="8ca7b-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">A project I started when I was 21… well, at least there’s consistency. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="5nv7n-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="5nv7n-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="5nv7n-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">It’s been the blurriest year so far. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="bcfqd-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="bcfqd-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="bcfqd-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Days and weeks strung together by hours of video calls, Slack and Zoom meetings, decisions that were postponed, indefinite lockdowns and hotel quarantines. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="2lap6-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="2lap6-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="2lap6-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Thankfully the days were also interspersed with beautiful walks along the river, loud laughter to bad jokes, making new friends and quality family time. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="dbnu6-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="dbnu6-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="dbnu6-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="eb6ll-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="eb6ll-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="eb6ll-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">The bulk of my 2021 days have just been about getting stuff done. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="d8ghe-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="d8ghe-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="d8ghe-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">But it’s also been a year of wrestling with who I am and who I’d like to be. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="dsa9c-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="dsa9c-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="dsa9c-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="3ll1v-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="3ll1v-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="3ll1v-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I faced a severe burnout a few months ago, a complete fizzling out of nerve endings. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="fatlb-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="fatlb-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="fatlb-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">A lot of people suggested I take walks, slow down, enjoy some ‘me time’ etc. to recover. All great suggestions. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="9ov9r-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="9ov9r-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="9ov9r-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">But I found that absolutely nothing helped until I forced myself to get to the very root of the problem. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="1rple-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="1rple-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="1rple-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Everything else was an escape, a welcome one, but also only temporary. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="8pf99-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="8pf99-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="8pf99-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="dcejk-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="dcejk-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="dcejk-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I’m trying to be less of an escapist as I grow older. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="4vq5m-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="4vq5m-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="4vq5m-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">All my life I’ve had easy access to escape zones: a piano, a set of crayons, a blank page. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="a1rls-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="a1rls-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="a1rls-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I’ve enjoyed the immunity that art and music has offered to me. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="26rjr-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="26rjr-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="26rjr-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="7ins2-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="7ins2-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="7ins2-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Immunity is necessary. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="5cue4-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="5cue4-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="5cue4-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">It allows us to protect and preserve our mindspace, creativity, identity. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="7rkak-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="7rkak-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="7rkak-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">But maybe that’s just the equivalent to living in a bubble. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="as25k-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="as25k-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="as25k-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Hmmm. Never gonna let go of my lovely little bubble. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="demmd-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="demmd-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="demmd-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="18g9q-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="18g9q-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="18g9q-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">The other day I saw a great big papad in my dream. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="demj9-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="demj9-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="demj9-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I woke up the next day and fried myself a great big papad. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="7ihpe-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="7ihpe-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="7ihpe-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Some dreams are so easy to make come true! </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="2nk0o-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="2nk0o-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="2nk0o-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="c0rtj-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="c0rtj-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="c0rtj-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I rediscovered what it means to be a good friend in the last few months. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="23fnv-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="23fnv-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="23fnv-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">You can’t possibly be there for someone all the time but it’s worth trying ;) </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="903ka-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="903ka-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="903ka-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I’ve been lucky to have the steady, unwavering presence of my best friend for more than half my life now. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="5n0e7-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="5n0e7-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="5n0e7-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">It’s great knowing that someone’s always got your back. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="da81d-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="da81d-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="da81d-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="cc8e9-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="cc8e9-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="cc8e9-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Interesting things I heard this year from various people: </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="8q0ei-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="8q0ei-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="8q0ei-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">-“No need to say stay safe because we are always making safe choices in life. I like to say ‘be brave.’” </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="e84el-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="e84el-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="e84el-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">-“You’ve built so many fences in your head. Freedom is in your head too.” </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="fmjsp-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="fmjsp-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="fmjsp-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">-“Today I saw a guy riding a motorcycle without a helmet, driving on the wrong side of road, overtaking a bus from the right, but had a big mask on his face and cotton in ears and he says he's scared of coronavirus!” </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="34dsm-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="34dsm-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="34dsm-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">-“It’s cool to be uncool sometimes.” </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="f49hk-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="f49hk-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="f49hk-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">-“We define the reality we live in.” </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="8fj4r-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="8fj4r-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="8fj4r-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">-”Why do you feel guilty about thoughts in your head that have no bearing in the external world? Enjoy your fantasy.” </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="5i6q4-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="5i6q4-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="5i6q4-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="2alkq-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="2alkq-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="2alkq-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I woke up one day a few weeks ago and felt like going on a train somewhere. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="an0rt-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="an0rt-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="an0rt-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">So I did. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="859b9-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="859b9-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="859b9-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I took a train up to the east coast and sat near a river. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="7t1nh-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="7t1nh-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="7t1nh-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I watched curlews wade in the water and barn swallows catch insects in the air. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="6bn0l-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="6bn0l-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="6bn0l-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="2b9qv-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="2b9qv-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="2b9qv-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Birding continues to change my everyday life. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="49s69-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="49s69-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="49s69-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I love knowing that I just have to look up to find something awesome. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="fleps-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="fleps-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="fleps-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="dva52-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="dva52-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="dva52-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I told a friend I was going mad the other day. He replied that if I was sane enough to acknowledge it,I wasn't there yet. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="an9gs-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="an9gs-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="an9gs-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I guess that’s oddly comforting? </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="5usu-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="5usu-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="5usu-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="1ee6l-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="1ee6l-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="1ee6l-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Going for a swim almost every day has helped me stay sane. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="3mplb-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="3mplb-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="3mplb-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I love swimming at my own pace in my own lane, knowing there are others ahead of me, knowing that others are taking over, but I’m still swimming and moving forward. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="e0cvd-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="e0cvd-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="e0cvd-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Okay no, I absolutely hate these annoyingly fast people, BAN these show-offs plz. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="f7rpu-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="f7rpu-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="f7rpu-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="ah40h-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="ah40h-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="ah40h-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I skinny-dipped in a river for the first time this summer, impulsively, spontaneously.</span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="c79n0-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="c79n0-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="c79n0-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">It was so incredible. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="eib2v-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="eib2v-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="eib2v-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">You know those moments when life seems so worth living? And the world tells you it’s got a slot reserved just for you? </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="aej2q-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="aej2q-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="aej2q-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">It was one of those moments.</span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="5c0qr-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="5c0qr-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="5c0qr-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I’ve been lucky to have plenty of those moments thrown my way. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="4euer-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="4euer-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="4euer-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="bq7s-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="bq7s-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="bq7s-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I also swam in the sea “properly” for the first time. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="fkjtg-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="fkjtg-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="fkjtg-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">The movie Jaws still haunts me: sometimes when I’m alone in the pool, I feel like a shark will emerge out of nowhere. I've graduated from thinking that sharks will emerge from the loo though, so I guess it's an improvement. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="ddgmh-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="ddgmh-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="ddgmh-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="5s72a-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="5s72a-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="5s72a-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I love growing vegetables. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="frfut-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="frfut-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="frfut-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Cucumber flowers are simply so pretty. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="9rt1k-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="9rt1k-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="9rt1k-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="9cdpc-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="9cdpc-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="9cdpc-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I’d love to play bass guitar. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="es1f0-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="es1f0-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="es1f0-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">If I could do it all over again, I’d have a real, honest shot at music. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="cjif8-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="cjif8-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="cjif8-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I love the idea of throwing myself into something with single-minded dedication. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="6tqif-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="6tqif-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="6tqif-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Unfortunately I don’t think I can ever be happy with single-minded dedication to just one thing. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="8029f-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="8029f-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="8029f-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I can have single-minded dedication to many things perhaps? </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="8tb1c-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="8tb1c-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="8tb1c-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="fkpj4-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="fkpj4-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="fkpj4-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">My level of self-awareness has exponentially increased with age. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="3pndc-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="3pndc-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="3pndc-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I used to think that I wasn’t a bold person, but when I look back I find enough proof of having demonstrated fearlessness. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="3nuq5-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="3nuq5-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="3nuq5-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I used to think that I was a bad decision-maker but when I look back I find that I’ve made some incredibly kickass decisions. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="2917c-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="2917c-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="2917c-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Woohoo I’m awesome. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="bikq2-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="bikq2-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="bikq2-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I’ve been told that self-diagnosis is dangerous but at least helps boost ego in this case. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="f8q0h-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="f8q0h-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="f8q0h-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="22mdc-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="22mdc-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="22mdc-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">This year, I worked on a secret project in which I created sad and depressed comics: the antithesis of thetapcomics. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="7keqs-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="7keqs-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="7keqs-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I called it the sink comics, upon the suggestion of a friend (“You’ve got the tap for the happy stuff, just put the sad stuff in the sink.”) </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="48le7-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="48le7-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="48le7-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">It’s worked very well in helping me stitch together dark cynical thoughts into some kind of coherent form. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="cvgp6-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="cvgp6-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="cvgp6-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Yes yes I do have a Dark Side. So there. Ha! </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="e99dd-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="e99dd-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="e99dd-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">One day I will release it into the world to balance out all the sappy cutesy "happy" preachy motivational inspirational nonsense that I've unthinkingly contributed to </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="aa4v6-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="aa4v6-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="aa4v6-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="24rfv-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="24rfv-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="24rfv-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">It’s really difficult to solve a problem when you’re in it. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="9lkk4-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="9lkk4-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="9lkk4-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">You can’t really see it when you’re in it. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="3shl1-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="3shl1-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="3shl1-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="6ceig-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="6ceig-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="6ceig-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">There is no greater feeling than the feeling of someone having placed their trust and confidence in you. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="f53fp-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="f53fp-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="f53fp-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="c6eca-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="c6eca-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="c6eca-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I spend 12 days in a hotel quarantine and I had a surprisingly nice time in isolation. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="9kqrn-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="9kqrn-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="9kqrn-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">The greatest gift of all is to be able to amuse yourself even when you're most alone, I think. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="4676l-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="4676l-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="4676l-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Access to WiFi helps. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="5jjqa-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="5jjqa-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="5jjqa-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="fqlq3-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="fqlq3-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="fqlq3-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I’m used to feeling “too much”. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="46hlc-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="46hlc-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="46hlc-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I think it’s so much more empowering than it is limiting. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="crd45-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="crd45-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="crd45-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I feel too much all the time. Now all this too much has to go somewhere. I can’t possibly be the container for it all you know? </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="4tubt-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="4tubt-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="4tubt-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">And so I draw, write, make music, talk to people, create stuff. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="8mech-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="8mech-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="8mech-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I must say it’s been very enjoyable. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="e47b8-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="e47b8-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="e47b8-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br data-text="true" /></span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="b75fv-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="b75fv-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="b75fv-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">When you think about how to live your life, you just want to do more of the stuff you like doing and less of the stuff you don’t like doing. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="8gfa4-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="8gfa4-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="8gfa4-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I’m getting closer to that dream everyday. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="5u8ub-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="5u8ub-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="5u8ub-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Not bad I say, not bad at all. </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="4aqpk-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="4aqpk-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="4aqpk-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I thought I would at some point end these posts saying I want peace and quiet, but I once again find myself saying that I'm looking forward to more adventures :) </span></span></div></div><div class="" data-block="true" data-editor="a7ic7" data-offset-key="ftddp-0-0"><div class="_1mf _1mj" data-offset-key="ftddp-0-0" style="direction: ltr; position: relative;"><span data-offset-key="ftddp-0-0"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Here’s to more loud laughter to bad jokes, beautiful walks along the river and quality time with family and friends. </span></span></div></div></div></div>Ramya Sriramhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05341916424439858652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-69196932821466614242020-11-18T22:45:00.004+05:302020-11-18T23:28:56.295+05:30the birthday post - 33<p> <span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">33! </span></p><span id="docs-internal-guid-65ac4297-7fff-e772-d274-26790ddef7ae"><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The age at which you really really stop caring about what people think about you. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This is me, crazy thoughts, wobbly bits and all. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">If you don’t like what you’re seeing... well, too bad. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This year has been all about self care. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The most profitable investment you can make is in yourself. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Property is also v. good they say. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I am amazed by people my age who own multiple houses. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I am also amazed by people my age who are semi-retired/thinking of retirement in the next few years. Planning goals! </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’m not far behind on the planning trend though. I do meal prep and have elaborate to-do lists. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It only seems fitting for this middle-age transition. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Life is a looooooongggg sprint. Priority items. Unresolved tickets. Backlog grooming. Resource allocation. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Life is a looooooonggg meeting. Agendas. Discussion points. Next steps. Quick breaks. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Life is like a looooooongggg document constantly being edited. A few tweaks. Some major rewriting. Some skippable chapters. Refine, refine. Revamp the design. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Life is like a looooooongggg…. you get the picture. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; white-space: pre-wrap;">Life is like a long holiday at times, which I can safely say are the best times. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Happiness is an umbrella term for all kinds of complex emotions that we feel. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It’s like our safe zone. We all want to be happy. It’s like we resort to it to escape from all other emotions.
Happiness is the sitcom we want to rewatch and rewatch because it’s comfortable and familiar. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But the things that truly change us are way more than just ‘happy’: frustration, grief, exhilaration, passion, desire, guilt. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I have a feeling I might have said something similar in an earlier birthday post. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But I’m 33: I’m allowed to repeat myself. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Two things I am constantly running out of: socks and spoons. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I sent myself flowers this year. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It came with a card that said from Ramya, to Ramya. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A very special kind of gift. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I scorned flowers until a few years ago: I thought it was an extremely uncool thing to gift someone: these plucked and dead things that attracted scary bugs. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A guy getting me flowers would not be appreciated. Roadside pani puri would do the trick. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But now I think flowers are rather pretty. And the bugs less scary. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Ah, how we change and evolve.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I like that word: evolve. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /><br /></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Some wonderful/interesting things I heard this year: </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Always remember: you are not your job. You are bigger and better than what you are at work.” --from an ex-colleague</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Isn’t it just easier to believe that people can be genuinely nice?” --My mom after I told her I couldn’t figure out whether someone was complimenting me or being nasty in some twisted way. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“You keep comparing that to this. Why compare? It's beautiful on its own. Like you’re comparing Scotland to Lakadah. Two different things. Beautiful in their own ways.” --From a friend. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“But wouldn’t it be nice for it to have a little rest?” -- My nephew after I told him that the heart is continuously working/pumping blood. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Some of the best moments from this year was reading to my 5-year old nephew and listening to his questions. What a beautiful mind. And a heart to match! </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We played the game of who can make a longer word until we settled on the variations of discombobulator: biscombobulator, kiscombobulator etc. Good times. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Friendships are the most curious of all relationships: there are no rules, no obligations, no templates to follow. Yet the loss of a friendship can be as or more heart-breaking than what society defines as a “break-up”. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sometimes the damage is just irreparable.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And accepting that is really, really hard. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But, as adults, we will shrug and move on. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We have been around for 3 decades, and that has equipped us to deal with these kinds of situations. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">To shrug and move on seems like a widely-accepted solution.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.6667px; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">When you're in love it feels like two people are part of the story.
When you break up, it feels like the pain is yours alone.</span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.6667px; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: Arial;">
</span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It’s incredible how much of this journey we’re doing in solitude even if we’re surrounded by friends and family. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">How much we live in our own individual heads. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">How many thoughts we think that nobody else has access to. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Everything is ultimately all about us. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Saved whatsapp messages, starred emails, experiences that are ours and ours alone, stories that only we know, memories that only we recognize. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Nobody else can really know what it’s like to be you. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">That should make each one of us feel really powerful. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Or very lonely. However your brain is wired. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">(You’re entirely in control of the choice though. Just FYI.)</span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’ve heard people say that Vipassanna is well worth the investment. But 10 days of not being able to draw or write or play music sounds really intimidating to me.</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I need to find other workarounds to find some inner peace and that. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A good swim and long walks work very well. The occasional cake. Throw in a gobi 65. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I struggle with high expectations. From life, from myself, from people around me. I expect to be amazed. I expect myself to do something amazing. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Next year I will lower my expectations a lot so that I can be amazed without even trying. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">People who say they aren’t chasing money are likely to have a reasonable amount already.
I might draw comics for the rest of my life. Or write. Or keep creating in some form. Even if nobody reads or cares. I think this irrepressible urge to create and share and having that outlet is what keeps me functioning 'normally'.
<span id="docs-internal-guid-d307f8a0-7fff-4a24-e6bc-a64cd1e0347f"><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline;">Space fascinates me, and I think it will be a bit disappointing once we know what’s out there. What’s out there might be really exciting but </span><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-style: italic; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline;">knowing</span><span style="font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline;"> makes it less exciting. </span></span>
</span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This year, success has taken on a new definition for me. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I think it’s about loving yourself truly madly deeply.</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It’s not at all an easy thing to do. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’ve always thought acceptance from others was important, but I suppose we should also accept ourselves. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When I was a little kid, a nun/teacher in my convent school asked me: Do you love yourself? </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Of course not! I declared, appalled. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I loved my family, my friends, and also Leonardo DiCaprio but surely it was wrong to love yourself. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I had no idea what it meant back then. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">To love yourself wholly, complete with your insecurities, fears and safely-kept secrets, is quite an achievement. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">When you actually examine the dark recesses of your mind, you wonder how you stay sane. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Staying sane is not entirely without effort. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">For some people, it can take an excruciating amount of effort on a daily basis. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I sometimes feel like life is so very limiting. But it’s also so very expansive and limitless. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I think it being content means you’re happy with the little things but not to the extent at which you start being complacent. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">A sentence that I think makes you sound like an adult more than any other: “It is what it is.” Shrug and say it in response to most anything and you’ll sound serious and enlightened. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">You’ll sound mature. Fully in control. I’ve carefully observed my friends over the last couple of years and I conclude this from my very reliable research. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I urge you all to try it. </span></p><br /><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I spent most of my twenties trying to figure life out. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’ve spent a lot of the last few years overthinking and overanalyzing and trying to unravel the mysteries of the universe. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I still struggle to find my purpose. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’ve always assumed that I’d eventually figure it out. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But I am now starting to suspect that there’s not much to figure out. There is no mystery waiting to be answered, no big secret waiting to be discovered. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I’m not sure whether that’s disappointing or elating. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Oh well. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">It is what it is. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So this is me, crazy thoughts, wobbly bits and all. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Off to welcome 33, and another year of surprises and Great Big Unknowns. </span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Tune in same time, next year! </span></p><div><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></div></span>Ramya Sriramhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05341916424439858652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-85324162128621403252020-01-03T23:14:00.002+05:302020-01-04T03:25:21.130+05:30Vision 2020<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
It's 2020 and I'm thinking maybe it's a good idea to revive this space. Not that it ever died really, I just became awfully conscious as an adult of airing my views in public. Omg the whole world is going to read my personal thoughts and make all these judgements about me! How can I put on public display my innermost thoughts? Well, it turns out that I've got enough innermost thoughts to last a lifetime so there's no risk of exposing myself <i>that </i>much also. Everyone's only getting the tip of the ice berg! Ha!<br />
<br />
So much noise online nowadays, no? I think I also contribute to it with my incessant social media presence and comics and ramblings. But maybe this white box can be my relief, a space for me to declutter. All this output is essential for mental hygiene I think. Cleanses the system. Maybe the Internet is one big garbage dump, a place for everyone's crumpled paperballs.<br />
<br />
Anyway, so the existential crisis has struck again, this time at 32. Funnily I felt the same angst at 23. I feel the same inadequacy, the same passion, the same desperation, the same burning desire to make some kind of positive change. I've been sitting with my notes and chewing my pen thinking about everything I'd like to do this year. I've had a very blessed life so far. And now it's time to give back. Do something grand. On a large scale. Life-changing. World-changing. VISION 2020.<br />
<br />
I think wanting to do good stems from the desire to be liked. Apparently there exists no charity in the world without some sort of selfish interest (source to be verified, I read this somewhere). Recently, on a flight, I was working my way towards my window seat, when I saw that a kid was already sitting there with his nose glued to the window. I apologetically told his mum that was my seat and then in an impulsive grand gesture I said no no, he can just keep sitting there. And for the rest of the flight the kid was literally singing "Amma look the sun!! It's heeereee! Amma the sky is sooo blueeee! Look look, the sun is here onlyyyy!" And I grinned from ear to ear to myself. I could even picture the halo around my head.<br />
<br />
Anyway coming back to the point of burning desire. I think some amount of dissatisfaction is necessary in life. And I don't mean the kind of dissatisfaction which is solved by going on a trip to Croatia (though I imagine that must be very therapeutic) or binge-watching a show on Netflix. It's a dissatisfaction that comes from some kind of "not-okay-ness". And the funny thing is this "not-okay-ness" is always there, even if we are super content with our personal lives. We live in a world which always needs some kind of fixing. Nothing is ever OK, and nothing ever will be.<br />
<br />
Our own daily lives seem (or mine, at least, seems) fairly selfish. Will we ever be more than what we share? More than our jobs, our daily chores, conversations with the tiny percentage of people we meet? Can we ever really make a massive difference? Is our worth defined by the number of people we are able to impact positively? I think the answer is yes. I sway between wanting to achieve some sort of sainthood status which will make me gloriously immortal (see what I mean by selfishness) and being a sour cynic, grunting about how everything is ultimately futile. I'm yet to reach some sort of midway mark or some satisfactory resolution.<br />
<br />
On the whole, I think it's time to pay it forward. Time to give more, create more, share more. Care more! As I chew on my pen and chart out the plan for the next year, I hope to take small steps towards doing something bigger than my limited everyday life, and grunt less about the pathetic insignificance of it all. All I need to do is make sure that the list doesn't end up as another crumpled paper ball in the World Wide Wastepaperbasket. </div>
Ramya Sriramhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05341916424439858652noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-66380132531200977892019-11-19T00:01:00.001+05:302019-11-19T00:14:39.323+05:30the birthday post - 32<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">32!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">They say it's all officially over now. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">No more fun and games, only serious adult life. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But I feel pretty enthused only. Full steam ahead.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I debated putting an end to this yearly ritualistic rambling posts.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Because people say you should be more wary of putting out personal stuff on social media. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Everybody will read and judge you and all it seems. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">What rubbish. Who has that much time? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Most stuff on social media is here today, forgotten tomorrow. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Much like many things in life.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Maybe next year there will be no birthday post.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Will be cool and secretive and mysterious and all. Ha!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It’s funny how we spend a lot of our twenties trying to prove that we’re adults.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">At 32, there’s no need to prove anything to anyone. Time to chill.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I’ve spent time in my twenties trying to understand the meaning of life.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But I don’t think about it that much these days.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I’m now armed with some (possibly misguided) confidence that I’ll figure it out.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This year, I’ve learned the art of planning.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">If you live away from your home country, the crazy wild impulsive take-a-train-tonight travel doesn’t work.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Got to check all the three-day weekends and holidays beforehand, book tickets in advance, etc.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">One must plan stuff. There’s a good chance that it’ll work.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Out of the 500+ comics I’ve created, I just like one.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I hate my work on most days.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I feel like what comes out in words and pictures is just a teeny fraction of the universe in my head.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Music is a far better outlet.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">If I could choose to do it all over again, I would choose to be a pianist and perhaps nothing else.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It seems to me like friends don’t talk much in their 30s.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I think the distance grows startlingly with the passage of time.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Everybody is busy working, taking care of themselves, taking care of others, figuring out stuff, hating their jobs (or loving them), getting married, getting unmarried, having babies, writing long rants on their birthdays.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Or maybe everyone but me has learned the art of being cool and mysterious.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I was asked recently what advice I would dole out to school/college kids.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">A few years ago I would have said follow your dreams, chase passion, blah blah.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But after much thought, I’ve figured out what it is:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Don’t waste your brain.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It’s a marvellous, marvellous thing.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It also needs to be constantly monitored for optimum resource usage.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I’m learning to be careful about whom I lease out the space in my brain to.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This year, I’ve decided to try to be more objective.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I’ve found myself (in more situations than I like to) admit always choosing to believe some fantasy version of the story in my head rather than what’s actually happening.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Forever deluded.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But I guess we all are, no?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Choosing our own filters and lenses, subconsciously or otherwise.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Maybe it’s better that way.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I struggled with settling down in a new country a few years ago.</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Friends worldwide seemed to do it with apparent ease -- passport stamp, stamp stamp.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It was only when I spoke with a friend that I realized he was going through the thing.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">People should swap stories more.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There should be entire events built solely with the purpose of story swaps.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Real, meaningful stories. Not the “All good”, “Not too bad” kind of rubbish exchanges.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I’ve learned that being an adult means nobody wants to get into details.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We like to say “All good”, irrespective of the truth.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It turns out that it’s not cool to talk about things you think it’s not cool to talk about until you actually talk about it.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I want to put an end to this “makes me happy” language.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Gimme the full range of emotions, gimme it.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I always ask for trouble.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Meaningful conversations seem like rare gems nowadays.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Quick, put them in a box.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Revisit occasionally.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Precious savings for a rainy day.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There’s way too much hate speech in the world.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">On some days, I think we’re a bunch of pathetic idiots.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">On others I think the world is full of kind and wonderful people doing fantabulous things.</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There’s so much crap yet there’s so much hope.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">My heart aches when I see lovely, kind people in thankless jobs.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We say thank you far too less.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">An adult can never really think like a child.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We know too much.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And there are so many problems that come with knowing too much.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But the more you know and discover, the more you realize just how much more you don’t know…</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I find it bizarre that we accept that we don’t have answers to fascinating things like space and god and why mobula rays jump but we can drive ourselves crazy about why someone won’t talk to us.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Apparently you can’t really see the sun rise over the waters in Goa because it’s west coast and you can’t see sunrise over the sea in Chennai because it’s east.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I’ve had trouble digesting this newly acquired bit of info. Never thought of it that way.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I’ve learned to be OK with liking another country without feeling like a desh-drohi.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I love cow parsley.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I love studying the shapes of leaves. I’d like to be a nature illustrator.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The thing I love most about the UK is the freedom to walk pretty much anywhere.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It’s impossible not to fall in love with the English countryside, the wide open skies and trails along the coast.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Trees are cool.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Discovering birds has changed my life. I don’t think I can ever be bored again.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I think knowing that birds exist (and I mean really knowing, listening, watching) makes you feel less alone.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">One of the highlights of the last year was watching a massive starling murmuration. Tears happened. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Birds are cool and clever and kind of hilarious at times.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I love watching blackbirds sunbathe in the garden in summer.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I don’t own binoculars and don’t use bird-tracking apps but being a bird-watcher and bird-listener has made me use my eyes and ears like never before.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">What powerful faculties we have at our disposal! Lucky us.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Interesting things I heard this year:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">“If you ask the right questions, you’ll find the right answers,” a friend, after I said I was going through existential crisis. (I’m still waiting for someone to leak that question paper.)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">“Zameen ki khushbu nahin toh baarish ka kya fayda?” a friend, after I mentioned that the rain in the UK didn’t smell like the rain back home.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">“Nobody is worthy of such adulation,” a friend, after I said that I was mesmerized by someone who was indifferent to my existence.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">“Lower your expectations,” from a friend, after I grumbled that I’d been struggling with the same paragraph for over two hours.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">“Sometimes you have to put yourself first,” the wise Amma, who else? ;)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I’m incredibly possessive of my time.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I never thought I’d say this but I’ve grown to love spreadsheets. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I’ve got better at dealing with crappy days. I tell myself: It’s just one bad day.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Life is more than one bad day.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I’ve got better at making decisions. I tell myself: There’s only one way to find out.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I like how we don’t have to make an effort to get night to fall or the sun to rise.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Many things happen automatically.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">A lot of the big stuff is taken care of.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We just have to get better at filling in the blanks.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It’s nice to be in control.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There’s no other option, no?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It feels pretty good.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Hello new year, brace yourself, I’m coming hurtling at top speed.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Cheers!</span></div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-9872669329602562582019-10-20T02:06:00.000+05:302019-10-20T02:06:17.543+05:30The blahness of adulthood: Musings of a 30-something<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Loans and EMIs and Big Decisions and Big Responsibilities and Planning in Advance. That’s what I thought being an adult involved. And it turns out it’s exactly what I had anticipated.<br />
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<br />
I feel like an awful lot has changed from my 20s to my 30s. It seems to me that I’ve spent the first three decades of my life having the good fortune to be wild, carefree and impulsive. Had my head in the clouds, but feet on the ground, was a little lost but incredibly driven, hopelessly romantic but reluctantly practical. Somewhere along the way, the scales tilted and I find myself a less wild, less carefree and less impulsive person.<br />
<br />
<br />
One of the first thing I noticed as an adult was a startlingly conspicuous drop in the number of calls from friends (and the calls I made to them). Suddenly there were Bigger Priorities. To-do lists got longer and longer, not just my own I suspect, those of others too. Social media, if it’s anything to be trusted, confirmed that some friends were alive and kicking. Those who dropped off social media were in touch once a few months or a few years, mostly for major announcements. Nobody talked about anything serious they were going through. Only good news was broadcast.<br />
<br />
<br />
While I struggled with settling in another country, I was amazed to see friends shining in a nomadic existence — passport stamp, stamp, stamp. It was only when I spoke to a dear friend who shared my new-country loneliness did I realize something. We are so careful about what we share as adults. Our troubles and frustrations are to be battled with as lone warriors, when everything is quiet in the dead of night. We are fiercely proud, with only our pillows as witnesses to our tears.<br />
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One of the reasons we hesitate to share and swap stories frequently as adults is perhaps because we never know what’s going on in the other person’s life. We tread carefully. Things are great, I declare. All good here too, the friend says. I hesitatingly say that things have actually been less than great. She is concerned. I go first. She then admits that she’s been through a rough patch too. She goes next. It’s like we need to confirm that we’re in the same boat, and that’s the signal for us to go ahead and share. If one of us didn’t make the first move, it would have been any other grown-up conversation — bullet-pointed life updates and a quick exchange of pleasantries.<br />
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In a way, it’s because we are simply more considerate I think. You don’t want to make a new house announcement to someone who just lost their job, you don’t want to talk about your divorce to that happily married friend. I’m always a little nervous before catching up with someone after a long time, like they’re going to tell me about what a horrible year they’ve had, but they’re all better now, and I’d feel like a terrible, helpless and absent friend.<br />
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Being an adult means being more private, more independent. Being an adult means we don’t really want to get into details. Everything’s okay, we say. All good. Nobody needs to know the nitty-gritties, we have no time and even less patience. The standard response to ‘What’s up?’ becomes a casual, offhand “Nothing much”, which could mean anything from nothing much to massive life-changing events.<br />
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The other thing I’ve noticed is that everything needs to be Planned. Ugh! There’s less scope for taking off as you please. In January, think about where you’re going in summer. In summer, book your tickets for the Christmas break. If you’re not going anywhere at all, think about what life goals you’re going to achieve. Make a list. Plan your retirement. Plan your savings. Plan when you’re going to quit your job and run off to the mountains like everyone else supposedly is. Plan the concert you want to attend. Plan your studies. Plan B. Plan that house you’re going to buy. Plan for the future. Plan for just in case. Plan for yourself. Plan for those dependent on you. Plan the next career move. Plan what’s for dinner. Plan your three-day weekends.<br />
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We plan because we want to Be Prepared. We want to be ready for the what-ifs, ready for bad news, ready for change, ready with our resources. Forget about being ready when the sky falls or when the aliens come or when the world ends, we’ve got to plan for the next hour. Some of us try the no-planning plan, which only lasts until you burn out of the weekday-work-weekend-Netflix routine. Then you get up one day with renewed resolve and say, Ah Yes! Today I’m Going To Plan.<br />
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Lastly, the most disturbing discovery of my thirties: so much of the romance is dead. Maybe this is also because I moved out of a dramatic tropical country to a stiff-upper-lip, colder country. But yes, I think we become decidedly unromantic as adults. We are far less accepting of the outrageous. We frown upon people who seem flippant and frivolous. We are proper, we mind how we behave, we try to say the right things. We look out of windows saying, oh look, it’s raining, but we don’t let loose and dance in the street with abandon.<br />
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The scary part is that it gets astonishingly easy to be an adult and do adult-like things. Mostly because everyone else does. And the easier it gets, the more comfortable we get. The more comfortable we get — -oh we know it already: it’s all gloom and doom from this point onwards.<br />
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I hate to admit that in my thirties, I seem to have become a new avatar altogether. I revisit my older crazy self in only bouts of Sunday nostalgia, when I bellow the lyrics to an old song while in the shower. I drop my guard less frequently, I care about what others think. I’m more integrated into society. I’m painfully conscious about what I let show. I sweep all the stuff that matters under the sofa and say “all good” and “nothing much”. I only look at my phone in the mornings, not at 3 am, when I want to have a long meaningful conversation with whoever’s awake.<br />
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I reflect on everything I’ve written and it seems like this transition into adulthood is for the better. I’m more in control, more considerate, more cautious, more independent. I plan better, I try to say just enough. I mind my own business, I help when I can, I drink lots of water. I stop thinking the world revolves around me, I stop trying to change the world. I’m wiser, more confident, better prepared.<br />
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But in spite of all of this, I feel like I’m less than half the person I used to be.<br />
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Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-69290254961815900212018-11-23T21:49:00.003+05:302018-11-23T21:51:01.957+05:30the birthday post - 31 <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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(For those who don’t know what this is about, I have been writing notes on every birthday since I was 21. Oh just some silly old tradition :))</div>
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I almost didn't write a post this year.</div>
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I started these posts when I was 21, and ten years seemed like enough. Nice round number. </div>
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But it's great to keep at something I started a decade ago. </div>
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Otherwise I'd have to say, "I used to write these articles..." - and then this would just become something I used to do. </div>
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The first year of 30 has been a mixed bag. </div>
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In my late twenties, I thought a lot about how I defined home, happiness, friendships and relationships. </div>
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I experimented, rebelled, travelled, and was a passionate nonconformist. </div>
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Post 30, I watch a lot of TV and try not to think. Other people can do the nonconforming. Goodnight sweetdreams. </div>
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I'm very lucky to have found my passion -- something I think will sustain me forever. </div>
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I think learning music/any form of art always gives you something to fall back on -- it keeps you sane, healthy, rooted. </div>
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There's nothing like sitting at the foot of a roaring waterfall in the Western Ghats. </div>
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What a magical range of mountains, these. </div>
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What is it that's so therapeutic about water? </div>
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I recently discovered I've been swimming wrong all my life.</div>
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But I love swimming all the same, and no matter how I feel when I get in, I'm in "bring it on!" mode when I get out. </div>
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How many houseplants is too many houseplants?</div>
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Monstera is a fascinating plant. It just sits there and looks pretty. </div>
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It continues to look pretty when nobody's looking. </div>
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I'm slowly starting to understand privilege. </div>
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I'm grateful to have had an immensely supportive family, good health, and the resources to do everything I've been able to. </div>
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One person's good fortune is perhaps another person's sacrifice. </div>
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It's amazing to think that most everyone in the UK has access to clean air, water and healthcare. </div>
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India feels like an impossibly complicated gigantic knot that can't be undone. </div>
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Sometimes, sitting here in the comfort of a nicely warmed UK home and watching the politics back home, she seems like a beautiful lady helplessly trying to untangle her matted hair. </div>
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My heart aches for India sometimes, so much I love. </div>
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Reading about the work Goonj does has had a profound impact on my life. </div>
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I've often wondered if social media is bringing out the worst in people. Or was it that people were always this horrible? </div>
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Someone I know once said (about a political figure he disagreed with) that she 'deserved to be raped'. </div>
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Hmmm! The end of the world is coming. </div>
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Kalyug, Amma says. No hope etc. </div>
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I once received a comment from someone on Reddit who said my comic was the emptiest, worst piece of content he's ever seen. </div>
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I wrote back to him saying that I try my best. He immediately apologised and said not to take it 'personally' and that he didn't really mean it. </div>
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Anonymous people are brutal.</div>
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But that's just what they are -- anonymous. </div>
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Being sensitive is a blessing. </div>
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But I guess apathy can be wonderfully insulating? </div>
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It surprises me how little we can do for the people we care about deeply. </div>
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You can reach out, be there, talk to them, console, lend a ear, offer a shoulder -- but sometimes, I think. Is that it? Is this really all we can do for another human being? </div>
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Appreciation, or rather the hunger for it, can kill the artist/creator.</div>
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We live in an age where writers are optimizing for SEO, artists are running after the 100th like, and everybody is a white-text-on-black-background poet on Instagram. </div>
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That end of world? It's coming soon. </div>
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This year, I hit upon the magic formula. It's to "Zoom out". </div>
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Zooming out of a situation makes you realize how stupidly inconsequential everything is. </div>
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It can empower and liberate you. </div>
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Losing sleep over something? Zoom out. Had a bad day at work? Zoom out. Wondering what people will think/say? ZOOM OUT. </div>
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It's the secret to true happiness. Take it. </div>
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If that doesn't help, watch Planet Earth 2 over and over again. </div>
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Good health is something to be grateful for, each and every day. </div>
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It's so sad that we become more careful and more reserved as we grow up, always thinking about how much of us we can let others see.</div>
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It's great to do something with abandon, with no self-consciousness. </div>
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There was a time when I put myself all over the Internet without really caring... </div>
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Those were good times. </div>
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I think social media is killing friendships/relationships. </div>
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We think we have some insight into somebody's life because we know that they've had noodles for dinner. </div>
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Haha! We have no clue what's going on. A simple "How have you been?" can lead to many surprising responses and the realization that we make wrong, wrong assumptions. </div>
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This year, I found that while friendships can sustain and nourish, they can just as easily fade away. </div>
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It always takes two. </div>
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Living with one of the nicest people on the planet has enriched my life. </div>
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Snail mail can be immensely comforting. </div>
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Growing your own vegetables can be super satisfying. </div>
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Plant a seed, watch it sprout and peek through the soil, look at those tiny leaves -- simply miraculous! And surprisingly easy. </div>
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I spent most of the summer tending to lilies and herbs and chillies and carrots. </div>
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You can't see it when you're in it. </div>
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We can get all judgy about someone else, we can offer advice, we can think how stupid they are, but it isn't till we find ourselves in the very same situation that it hits us: </div>
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<i>You can't see it when you're in it. </i></div>
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Success means different things to different people. </div>
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It's mostly comfortable people who say that money doesn't matter. </div>
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I would like to care less and less about what people think. </div>
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I would like create content that is enduring, that people will read after years and years, and still find meaningful. </div>
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Interesting things I heard this year: </div>
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From a doctor in the UK: "You can show us your reports from India. You can get them translated." </div>
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From a friend, a new mum, about her daughter: "She's all I want." </div>
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From a friend after telling her I draw 'just' stick people: "Don't ever be dismissive of your own art." </div>
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From a hair stylist who was doing my hair: "Oh, there's nothing I haven't tried. I've dyed my hair pink, orange, been bald, had leopard prints, everything. You should experiment when you can. That's what hair is there for, right?" </div>
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Overheard at the hospital: "Just because you couldn't do something the first time doesn't mean you can't try again," a mum to her 1-year old, who was unable to poke his sound-emitting teddy bear hard enough for it to squeak. </div>
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Response to an article I wrote about doing something for the love of it: "But why would you do something unless you want appreciation? That would be a waste of time, no?" </div>
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From my doctor: "Don't anticipate pain."</div>
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I think I've changed quite a lot over the last year. </div>
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Amma says it's all about evolving, something she's been remarkably good at. </div>
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Quite a nice concept, this evolution. </div>
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I think I still have some bits of leftover youth.</div>
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Must put to good use. </div>
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Hello, new year full of promise. </div>
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Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-53903600024016565702017-11-18T04:18:00.000+05:302018-11-16T04:22:07.977+05:30the birthday post - 30<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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This is my tenth <span class="il">birthday</span> post, so here's to a decade of keeping this tradition alive :)</div>
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I've taken in the world for 30 whole years. </div>
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I must say it's been altogether intoxicating. </div>
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I'm immensely grateful to be part of this world and to have experienced so much of the wonderful things it has to offer. </div>
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This year has been one of the most insightful so far. </div>
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I feel like I've grown years in this one year, and like I've travelled mentally to far-flung areas. </div>
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This year, I've been on a journey of self-discovery. </div>
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I've had a short stay in the 'Lost and Found' box -- but it was well worth it. </div>
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Ever since I've moved, I feel like I'm constantly travelling. </div>
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Things still jump out at me and take me by surprise. </div>
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I'm deeply in love with the countryside here -- the swans, the streams, the sycamores. </div>
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Home travels with you. </div>
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Home is about freedom. And acceptance. </div>
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I love cane and bamboo furniture. </div>
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I have a weakness for plants, especially on window sills and desks and bookshelves. </div>
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Peace lilies are still my favourite plants. </div>
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I've spent a great amount of time this year watching the various creatures in the garden -- especially the birds. </div>
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The best way to never get bored in a house is to install a bird feeder.</div>
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My favourite bird this year has been the pied wagtail. </div>
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Your thoughts can wreck your body. </div>
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The easiest way to lose weight is by being really, really happy. </div>
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You will never be thin enough or fat enough or fair enough or good enough for society -- something will always be wrong. </div>
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With them. </div>
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I really miss the days when blogging was about writing honestly. </div>
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Now writing, at least on an online public platform, seems to be marred by SEO optimization and character limits. </div>
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I've even seen people voluntarily add a "Tweet this!" button next to sections of text. I cringe at that. </div>
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But then again, I hashtag the life out of my comics on Instagram, so who am I to complain? </div>
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I have over 300 comics waiting to be sorted, but I use up all free time to keep drawing new ones. </div>
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Seems like an awful waste of time to be sorting out stuff from the past. </div>
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That applies in other contexts, too. </div>
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I am highly attracted to driven people. </div>
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I don't think I can ever stop drawing or writing, irrespective of what people think of it. </div>
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Social media has also made us more conscious of ourselves and the image we want to create. </div>
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The more driven we are by external likes and shares, the less likely we are to write something which isn't measured by how readers are likely to react. </div>
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I think there is some kind of manipulation involved there, even if we are not aware of it. </div>
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I believe that good creative work comes from an internal impulse. </div>
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I always come home to writing because I feel like I have nothing to prove. </div>
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I have nobody to please. </div>
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It's such an enormous relief. </div>
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I've become awfully conscious of what I let out of myself online. </div>
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But I read so much online, and the best lessons are from others' personal experiences. </div>
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It's an age where we can no longer be completely free -- every move is being watched. </div>
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At least when we were younger, we only thought that God (and sometimes Santa Claus) was watching us. </div>
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Contentment is overrated. </div>
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I'm a little scared of being content -- I feel like it will be the point where all this passion and motivation dies down. No? </div>
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I love making music. </div>
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Jazz is complicated. </div>
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The more you don't understand it, the more beautiful it gets.</div>
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I guess that's what draws me to it so much. The mystery. </div>
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Other times, I just listen to disco. </div>
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I'm an email person and I would pick email over phone conversations with clients most of the time. </div>
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Couples often tell me their long and complicated love stories (to be illustrated), and each time, I feel so awed by the power of love. </div>
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Love moves mountains. </div>
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It causes enormous upheavals on the ground beneath your feet, for sure. </div>
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No matter how many clients I work with, the best rewards come as emails from people who respond to a particular comic or piece of writing. </div>
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Sometimes I wonder if I've been 'too nice' in the past. Especially to people who've not been so nice to me.</div>
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I had someone say something really mean about one of my comics on Reddit this year. I responded to them, and they quickly apologised, saying they had no idea the OP would actually read all the comments. </div>
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Funny what anonymity can do to people. </div>
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Working from home can be both liberating as well as isolating. </div>
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With a remote job, I always fancy that I'll work under the trees in a park, or run off to some fancy mountain resort. </div>
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But what I really want is a desk in a quiet corner within four walls. </div>
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I really want to explore India... </div>
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... On a deeper level. Live in longer periods in the villages, lose myself in busy towns, be overwhelmed by the cities. </div>
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Mostly interact with the incredible variety of people and learn from their experiences. </div>
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I love meeting new people. </div>
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I love house parties. </div>
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I like reading books and watching movies about space. </div>
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I learnt only two years ago that hens lay eggs every day, and that not all the eggs we eat were meant to hatch. </div>
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I also learnt only this year that there are gigantic cables under the sea that connects most of the world, and these were actually used for telephones/telegraphs earlier. </div>
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That's quite mesmerizing. </div>
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The more new things I discover, the more I realize that the number of things I don't know about is actually much more than I thought. </div>
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This year, I've watched a ton of life-changing movies. As a book-over-movie person, never thought I'd say this! </div>
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We evolve. </div>
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I'm uncannily like my mom in many ways. </div>
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Time doesn't heal. Not as much as willingness does. </div>
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"You have a great future." I heard this sentence first when I was 13 and then again recently at 29. Got me confused -- isn't this my future already? </div>
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I've realised that I write to remember, not to forget... it's not so much of a vent than wanting to hold on to a moment or an experience. </div>
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I write to capture a feeling, a story or an emotion that I don't want to lose. </div>
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Then I forget all about it, with the comforting knowledge that I can now revisit it at any time. </div>
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I never do. </div>
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The compulsion to write seems to stem from wanting to hold on. </div>
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I feel slightly upset when I can't remember my dreams. Guess that follows the same pattern. </div>
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Falling in love is so hard on the knees. </div>
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But <i>real</i> love doesn't bring you to your knees. </div>
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Self-control is a wonderful thing. </div>
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Just knowing that you have the power to pick and choose how you react (or how much you are affected by something) can make a huge difference. </div>
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I've been incredibly blessed to have the most amazing support system anyone could ask for -- my family, friends, well-wishers, relatives, mentors, teachers, readers, and more. </div>
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I'm really grateful to have all of you in my life. </div>
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I've taken in the world for 30 years. </div>
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My eyes are not the least bit tired. </div>
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I can't get enough! </div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: x-small;">30 is going to be awesome. </span><br />
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Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-70652890615776831092016-11-18T04:19:00.000+05:302018-11-16T04:34:28.373+05:30the birthday post - 29 <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This year, I faced an overwhelming amount of change. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">All those annoying quotes about change being constant are starting to make sense now.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I've redefined the meaning of home. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I've found that you can be rooted even if you're transplanted. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">India is home. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Well, so the redefinition hasn't helped all that much. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Much as I romanticize the idea of a nomadic life, for me, home is always one place. A steady, strong presence that's waiting for me as much as I'm looking forward to it. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Home is the place I can make a cup of coffee or tea to my preference, put my feet up, and sing as I wash the dishes. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">There are many different kinds of people in the world. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Everywhere, people are the same. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Emotional attachment can wreck you. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Letting go is freedom. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But I think the ones who get attached are the ones are lucky to have experienced it. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Because too many of us are unfeeling. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Or maybe we become like that eventually. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Falling in love can be hard on the heart. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">There's joy in losing your senses... for some time. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You could either go crazy or choose to be Comfortably Numb. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Either way, you might get Marooned. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">And then you'd have to Run Like Hell. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">From the two constantly haunting problems – Money and Time. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Very soon, we'll all be Lunatics on the Grass. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But there's no harm in having High Hopes... </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Gosh, I've got to stop this now. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Or else I'll Keep Talking. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Not everything you do should have some grand motive. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We should all do a great many things just for jolly. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I want to grow lots of plants. They make the best decor, no? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I hardly ever doodle... but don't tell anyone that. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I can't work without to-do lists. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I can't live without coffee. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I mean, of course I can. When you really think about it, our actual needs are very less... I'm slowly leaning towards a more minimalistic lifestyle. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Slowly. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Interesting stuff I heard this year: </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">"Don't be stupid." – when I told a friend I was homesick and wanted to move back to India. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">"Never be afraid of anything." – the better, unafraid half. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">"This is ghor kalyug." – Amma after Trump's win. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">"Put that machine away! It's very dangerous. We were better off when we didn't have those." – an elderly gentleman sitting next to me at the hospital, referring to my mobile. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I made a fuss when my mother wanted to send me 100 kgs of stuff from India. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But I had the most delightful time unpacking all the goodies. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Family = full glowing happies. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I love long, long walks. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I'm a terrible swimmer – but I love swimming. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It's the only sport I ever liked this much. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It's a great reminder that you've got to keep your head above the water. Periodically, at least. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The world is incredibly unpredictable and we're all living in our own little bubbles. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">2016 has been a shocker. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">An ideal way to spend my birthday would be to delete the 2000 unread emails and 3000 drafts in my inbox. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I've drawn about 400 comics so far. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I will draw and write for the rest of my life. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It seems the aim of everyone in the UK is to live in a sprawling home in the countryside, with sheep for company. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I would feel really isolated in that situation. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We've all got to take it easy. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Slow down, you crazy child, he said. Why don't people take the advice of these great musicians? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Age is just a number. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">And a wrinkle here, a double chin there. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">We underestimate the importance of a good slumber. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Five years ago, I would've said sleep is distracting me from all the wonderful things I've got to see and do. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Now, I feel those wonderful things can wait till next morning. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The world doesn't end overnight. Really. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Try dropping off the radar for a while. When you come back, in all likelihood, things will be the same. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I've rid myself of FOMO. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Try it people. Do away with all these weird acronyms and you'll be happy AF. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I always used to think that one's got to prepare for the worst...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But I've learnt to trust that nothing will go wrong. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It's easier to believe that anyway. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Confidence is your best weapon. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">A friend of mine always used to say, "So what? It's okay. You'll survive." </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I used to get offended back then. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Now I understand what it means. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The most important thing in life is life itself. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">That in itself calls for a huge celebration. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Here's to another year of madness. </span></div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-47459265773164487152016-01-02T04:15:00.000+05:302018-11-16T04:37:43.836+05:30the birthday post - 28<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Another year, another budday post!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">For the uninitiated, I started the birthday post tradition when I was 21. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">For the regulars, it's been 7 years of my rants in your inbox! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">When I started this, I had just quit an MBA. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This year, I quit a full-time job. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">All the years in between have been unbelievably exciting.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">You get to choose what kind of life you want. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Make your choice or circumstances work for you. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Don't feel trapped - it's not worth it. Been there! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I feel caged really quickly. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Drawing and writing full-time is a dream come true. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I have a sneaky feeling that teaching is my true calling.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">That TrueCaller app should actually tell you what your true calling is. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">If there's any place on earth I want to revisit, it's the school in Vellore where I used to volunteer.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I still can't carry a tray of glasses without sticking my tongue out. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I'm in awe of people who can stay composed throughout an entire day. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">My emotional graph per day dips and peaks in sine waves. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Freedom and independence is key. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">No relationship should tie you down or make you feel bound. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Fear blinds. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Love cements. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Trust frees.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Expectations stifle. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Music heals. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Freelancing teaches. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I can look at pictures on the Sanctuary Asia FB group all day. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">A couple of months ago, I went on my first birding trip and fell madly in love! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I now have a favourite bird per week.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">The best thing to do when you're depressed is to watch whale videos. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It's amazing to fall in love with non-human-beings. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Fall in love with an animal, a plant, a flower,a book, a hobby, a colour, a song. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It's amazing to fall in love with that which cannot leave. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Fall in love with yourself. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Let down your guard. But protect your peace of mind. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I learnt that the hard way. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">WordPress defines beauty. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I'm going to participate in Kala Ghoda festival someday. Maybe next year. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">One day, I'm going to drive my own car on the Bandra-Worli sealink. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I love busy cities. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I used to be a really nice person all the time but nowadays I'm a not-so-nice person. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I think it's okay to be a not-so-nice person when the situation demands. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I read once that you should win over the unkindest of people with kindness. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But I don't want to be kind to assholes. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Cassette tapes were the best because you actually listened to all the tracks. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I bought a harmonica this year. I'm struggling to play it. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I'd like to play the flute some day... perhaps the saxophone too.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But the rich sound of the veena beats all. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">This year, I stood in front of multiple audiences to speak about my work. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It was terrifying, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But after I was done, I felt like I was on top of the world. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I tried ziplining, went on two treks, bathed in waterfalls, encountered elephants, met amazing people last year. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Interesting things I heard over the year: </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">No matter how big the fuck up is, the world doesn't end. (from a friend) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">If my kids to go IIT, their life will be set. They will make my entire village proud. (our driver) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Jazz is not random. It has structure and form. You have to be thorough with the theory to make it flow. (jazz teacher) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Hyderabad is a selfish city. Everyone sits at home and plays music. Bring the music out, share, collaborate. Don't hide your talents at home. (jazz teacher) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">My biggest regret is that I didn't follow my dream at your age, so do it when you can. Start young. (a professor)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">If you want to seriously live your dream, move to Bombay. (CEO turned full-time flutist) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I grew up in the forest, and now I'm going to teach my kid its ways. (A new father and wildlife photographer, who took his 3-month old baby to camp in the wild. He'd done it at 6 months) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Life is short and there's so much to do, see, absorb and experience. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Life is short and you gotta keep yourself alive, kicking, and happy! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I always wanted to be skinny, dark and have curly hair. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Working on it. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But I'm sort of used to being chubby now. Hurts less on a bike. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I want to stand on my head soon. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Old friends are comforting because time has tested the relationship. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">New friendships are both exhilarating and exhausting. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Investing time and energy understanding the complexities that make up a human being can be rewarding. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Exhilarating highs usually, at some point, see abysmal lows. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">People keep telling me to not get attached to people and places. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But what's the point of wading through life without being attached or passionate?! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Growing plants makes me happy. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Money plants are the best. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Money money. It's important. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Beards still turn me on. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Every time I fell in love, I thought it was the only time I was in love. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Loving someone enough to let go of them sounds very nice on posters but is incredibly hard to implement. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Is it harder to have your own space or give others theirs? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Time doesn't heal everything. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But it's easier to pretend there's hope. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I wear socks with sandals and I doubt that's going to ever change. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">My toes get really cold quickly. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I listen to Honey Singh sometimes. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Yeah, how unexpectedly we all evolve! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Drawing is therapeutic. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">So are haircuts. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">And other people's babies. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I'm learning to never get stuck. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Never get stuck in one place, on one person, on one relationship, on one viewpoint. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Keep putting one foot ahead of the other. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Dance at least once a week. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Shower with music on.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Do everything you love. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Do everything you fear. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Do everything you haven't. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I sound so freaking preachy. It seems age does that to you.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">But I'm 28 and life's just begun! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Go out and celebrate everybuddy! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Have a absolutely fantastic year ahead! </span><br />
<div>
<br /></div>
</div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-35958777050651642922014-11-27T23:26:00.000+05:302018-11-16T04:21:25.681+05:30the agency <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
This place is a madhouse.<br />
<br />
There’s someone wanting to breed cows, there’s an ex-chef of a fancy hotel, there’s an angry young man threatening to leave every day (“fuck you all!”), there’s another stumbling about drunk and grinning stupidly at everyone. There’s this chap who simply refuses to look anyone in the eye or smile, there’s a girl who blurts out what she thinks with an endearing lack of discretion. There’s the rights activist posting frantically on facebook, there’s that guy walking up and down in a silent, unnerving way, sneaking up behind our computers. There’s the world-weary, resigned chap in the corner, there’s the unperturbed illustrator lost in his own world. There’s the tomboy, with unexpected displays of girlishness, there’s the classroom bully with a heart of silly putty. There's someone killing us a little bit every day with his bad jokes, there's someone else who mysteriously disappears for really long hours during work, calling it lunch. There’s someone who laughs to himself periodically, making us all wonder whether he’s insane or whether he’s secretly laughing at our insanity.<br />
<br />
Mornings usually begin with the santoor, go on to Telugu carnatic remixes, touching some Illaiyaraja on the way, before drifting into 90s Hindi film songs and some clean blues guitar. At exactly 10:30 a.m. every day, the gratingly overdone Nothing Else Matters is played by aforementioned angry young man with a seriousness I find amusing. On darker, busier days, Sadhguru spreads his gyan to a mix of believers and skeptics, after which plays a song about samhalofying zindagi such that it doesn’t become mauth. On some afternoons, violins and flutes spring to life, and on others, stand-up comedians on YouTube have their stage. Dog videos are regulars; whole movies are watched. There are politics, there is bitching, there are friendships. Everyone seems be ready to attack, counter, defend, prove. The energy level is high, frustration levels are higher, and heated exchanges take place every few minutes.<br />
<br />
There are arguments, disagreements, disappointments, pull-your-hair-out moments. Heads come together to put together some brilliant stuff, whiteboards get inked in and abstract ideas bounce, fly, spin, shape up and get converted to the tangible. Brains tick, fingers type, hands draw, and the greys take on colour. Sketches are shared, criticism is selectively digested, approval is received with relief.<br />
<br />
It’s incredibly satisfying to have cracked something and see it come to life... It's like learning animation and finding that something actually moves.<br />
<br />
After five years in academic publishing and working with scientists, educators, researchers and professors (your typical khadi-kurta crowd), this is a breath of fresh air. After five years of Dears and Warm Regards, the lack of salutations is strangely liberating. After five years of careful, polite speech, the vocabulary took on colours within a week of being here. After five years of a silent editorial floor, the noise is more than welcome. I desperately wanted change, and that part is taken care of.<br />
<br />
The very newness of it all is enough to sustain interest. There is constant food for the brain, there are a hundred stories and comics packed in a twelve-hour span. There are enough characters to fill a series. At the end of the day, everyone’s passionate about something, be it at work or outside work. There’s never not enough to talk about. Conversations aren’t boring. People aren't boring. Everyone comes in a distinct flavour. Everyone brings a different approach. Everyone draws a different tangent to the circle - and that's making this ride worthwhile.</div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-63459827002690096962014-11-26T22:33:00.000+05:302018-11-16T04:21:25.904+05:30A story worth telling<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">I was travelling to Chennai by train in a third class compartment. There were six of us – me, one uncle and four aunties. We silently stared at each other till it was time to eat, during which I made some small talk to break the staring match, and then we ran out of things to talk about so we sat and stared again till it was time for us to put up the beds and go to sleep. I was on the upper berth, much to my relief, and I gladly made my escape.<br /><br />I climbed up the iron rails and heaved myself onto the berth, when suddenly I felt something cold on my arm. I looked down, and to my horror, my left arm was covered in blood, which was steadily dripping onto the blue leather. I instinctively covered my hand before opposite Uncle could see it and make a fuss. I tried to discreetly slink (well, I don’t think I can slink with my bulk, but I tried) down to see what had happened, while trying to casually retrieve a piece of cloth from my bag at the same time. Unfortunately, I was right under Uncle’s nose and he saw some blood drip from my arm. I smiled wanly at him, while he exclaimed loudly,<br /><br />“OMG! You are hurt! How did that happen! OMG! Blood is coming!”<br /><br />“Er, yes, Uncle, it’s nothing, not even hurting, see I’ve got some tissue...”, I said, desperately hoping to get him to lower his volume.<br /><br />Meanwhile, Aunty in opposite middle berth saw what was happening, and springing up (banging her head on the upper berth in the process), started fumbling about in her handbag which she was clutching:<br /><br />“Oh beta how did you hurt yourself! Wait put some cream to stop the bleeding! Tie a handkerchief round your hand! Let us ask for the first-aid box!”<br /><br />And then she said this..<br /><br />“Oh no beta, I only have Fair and Lovely! Will that help?”<br /><br />I smiled at her and said it was really okay, and that the bleeding would stop soon. Except it didn’t.<br /><br />I inched closer to the edge of the berth and noticed a large nail sticking out of the side. So that was the culprit! I examined the wound again, wondering if there were chances of an infection, wishing everyone would shut up and go back to sleep.<br /><br />Meanwhile, everyone in my compartment was up, and before more suggestions were made, I asked one of the Aunties for talcum powder. Opposite Uncle suddenly looked excited and said he had a small dabba of talcum powder in his shaving kit. He scrambled down the berth, looking very pleased to be of help, switched on all the lights, pulled out a large suitcase from underneath the lower berth, and proceeded to unpack. I didn’t protest, feeling a bit silly, a bit guilty. He pulled out a bag, from inside which emerged a pouch. He unzipped it and handed me a small Ponds talcum powder dabba triumphantly. I put some on the wound, tied it up with my stole, and thanked him relievedly. I switched off the lights before any further ado and the night went on peacefully.<br /><br />I went to Pondy after that, where I spent a lovely weekend playing music and watching crocodiles with the boy. I had a waitlisted ticket for my journey back to Hyderabad on the same train. My mother was travelling on the train too – both of us were in separate coaches. At the last minute, my ticket was confirmed and to my surprise, it was the same berth and compartment as it was on my onward journey. I went to my mother’s place and gave her company for some time. I told her the story of how I hurt my arm, and she said, “Of course you’re going to look out this time, considering you know there may be something on that berth that can hurt you.” We had dinner and I left back to my coach.<br /><br />I held on to the ladder rails and hurriedly climbed up (I was afraid I might step on lower berth Aunty’s toes), when I felt something cold on my left arm. I looked down, and my worst suspicions had come true. I had done it again! A symmetrical, deep cut now dripped blood, just below the previous wound. I messaged my mother, who came to my berth, did some first aid and rubbed the embarrassment in.<br /><br />After some time, the attender came to my berth with a giant pair of pliers, asking where this nail was. This was my mother’s doing. He yanked at the nail and pulled it out, thus ending the story.<br /><br />It’s been over three years since this happened, and I still have two scars just below my elbow on my left arm. They look like they’re going to stay. </span></div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-91375575298488830822014-11-19T22:20:00.000+05:302018-11-16T04:23:14.651+05:30The birthday post - 27<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The world is full of amazing people doing amazing things. </span><br />
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">People kept telling me the other side of 25 sucks, but two years down, and it really hasn't been so bad.</span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">In fact, it's been pretty kickass. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">After five years in publishing, I switched jobs and joined an ad agency. <br />Ad agencies seem to be madhouses. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But music plays all day long, which is a plus. </span></div>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I might like to have a cat someday. I love the feeling of cats rubbing themselves against my legs. <br />I've gone a whole year without one train journey and it's making me miserable. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There's something about watching the whole world move in front of the window. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I like being around lots of people. Crazy, happy, nutty people having nonsensical conversations. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">RC whiskey still transports me.<br />I watch orca videos when I'm low. </span><br />
<div class="gmail_default">
<br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I discovered Andy Gibb this year. </span></div>
</div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have a crush on every other guy I meet. </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">My latest is this guy who washes cars near our office. Damn sweet chap, looks after our adopted stray puppy. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I've a weakness (and weak knees) for guys who are good with animals. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Also guys who make good dosas. And omelettes. <br /><br />I was at the receiving end of the following comments this year: </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>You're cut out to be a writer, you're not cut out for advertising.</i> (wtf?!)</span><br />
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>You've got a cute nose.</i> (many hours were spent examining it in the mirror)</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>You're full of surprises. </i>(Now we're talking </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">yo.) </span><br />
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>How many works you have? Why you are doing so much works? When do you play? </i>(Colleague's son, who spent a day with me at work)</span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>Let me give you some advice. Listen carefully to people and then go ahead and do whatever the fuck you want. </i>(This is a good strategy.)</span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I dislike driving in cities. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Baby you can drive my car.. and maybe I'll love you. <br />I've learnt to be suspicious. <br />Trust doesn't come easy as you grow older. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I get a kick out of meeting people who are everything that I am not. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This
new age traveller-tourist debate drives me mad. There is responsible
tourism/travel and irresponsible tourism/travel. End of story. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It's like we want to define each and every thing and slot people according to the category they fall into. <br />We want to divide, divide, divide - whether we say it out loud or not, our minds are judging, allocating, classifying. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I am prone to feeling caged. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Open spaces attract me. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Openness attracts me. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I am impressed by people who have a single-minded focus. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I like doing multiple things at once and I've realised that's what makes me who I am. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">My face is an open book. I suck at hiding what I think or feel. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I think I might be good at public speaking. <br />Being a Boss is tough. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Being a good one is even tougher. <br />I think I would like to be a Boss someday. </span><br />
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I'd be patient and calm and kind and inspiring and everyone would love me so...</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="display: inline;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Family is steadying. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="display: inline;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Love can be unsettling. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default" style="display: inline;">
<br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I love the sound of the mandolin. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I need to move to Bangalore.</span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The thought of moving abroad is just scary. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Mostly because you can't have 5 rupees chai on the roadside at 6 am. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I love white flowers. Peace lilies! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">My favourite colour is green. </span><br />
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I hate groups that are formed by a mutual dislike for another person. <br />I'm an escapist more than ever now.</span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
</div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Try your best to keep away, but some songs just stick. <br />Ab blue hai paani paani paani paani paani paani</span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I've learnt the importance of trusting that good things will happen. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Sleep is a highly underrated activity, especially by creative people. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Good, uninterrupted, deep sleep is a blessing. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Photographs used to be such a special thing. A birthday, a family
outing, a school farewell, sunset from Tiger Hill. Now they're just
setting suns from everybody's balconies, new hairstyles, owls, and
selfies with disproportionate forearms. <br />I find the word creative overrated. Again, a divide. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Everybody on this planet is creative. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I can wear kalamkari clothes all my life. <br />I always wanted to be dark and skinny, with curly hair. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I'm stubborn. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I love making things for people. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I believe in aloe vera.</span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I'm a sucker for children's books. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Birthdays make me happy. </span></div>
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There's cake. </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I will go and kindly do the needful.</span></div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-32400901249754157782014-09-30T08:44:00.000+05:302020-01-04T00:28:48.686+05:30Saarang, Spandan, Pegasus, Riviera.. <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="gmail_default">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I don't feel like it's been too long since we were all out in the open,
feet in the air, about to hit the ground, only to take off once more,
as we put all the energy in our bodies in sync with the screeching
guitars. We sang in harmony, trying to hear ourselves above the
vocalist, the air lifting our voices and offering it to the vast starry
sky above. <span class="il">Wisps</span> of <span class="il">smoke</span> wafted among us amidst the shadowy blacks.
Frayed edges of jeans dragged under floaters, bits of mud sticking to
them. <br /><br />In the quieter corners, couples and groups of friends
huddled under the trees, laughing, holding bottles of liquid that shone
in the moonlight. Different colleges made friends by exchanging
lighters, discussing the JAM or Mad Ads that were held earlier in the
day. Late night matches were held - volleyball, football, tennis. Chants
of every kind filled the air - winning chants, booing chants, cheering,
hooting, chants in kannada, tamil, english. Orange slush was served at
the stalls, congratulations were exchanged. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">In
the darker lanes, bushes shook with frenzied activity. The less
adventurous couples walked hand-in-hand, some swaying gently. In the
more frequented paths, lamp-posts stood at regular intervals, giving off
a warm yellow light that bathed us all. There was something about that
light. In those three days of madness, it connected us together - a
hotch-potch of faces and places - reflecting itself on tired but shining
eyes, toothy smiles and knobs of acoustic guitars. It enveloped us in
an energy that can only be found at college fests, and made us feel that
we were all connected by a common thread. It established itself as a
filter we would apply to pictures that we would revisit in future. </span></div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-47639611360300292502014-02-16T13:15:00.000+05:302018-11-16T04:21:25.796+05:30<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Suddenly all I can think of is riding my bike early in the morning to Ananda Vihara, down the road, up the hill, with the early morning chill biting my face and hands, and with the silvery sun rays through the trees. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">And I want to walk up the never ending flight of stairs, up to the entrance of the hall, look back and see the view, plump clouds that melt into blue at the horizon, the sweeping landscape of half of Secunderabad, the Buddhist monks playing downstairs with the garden hose. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">I want to sit in silence at the foot of the beautiful statue, close my eyes and get lost. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">When I get better, the first thing I'll do is this... </span></div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-88918315875970195672014-02-07T00:54:00.001+05:302020-01-04T00:26:54.300+05:30<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
In your lowest lows you've really got nobody to turn to.<br />
<br />
You can listen to some music though.<br />
<br />
</div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-90475791522964547662014-02-06T23:06:00.001+05:302018-11-16T04:21:26.126+05:30thursday physics <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
The body is designed to take on only a certain amount. When the effort applied is herculean and the load unbearable, the fulcrum ceases to exist, causing the levers to get completely mixed up in one circus of disproportion. </div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-80275771543434236162013-12-30T08:53:00.000+05:302018-11-16T04:23:49.806+05:30The birthday post - 26<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have decided to embrace 26. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It is, after all, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9JDTUVCxoM" target="_blank">one of my favourite songs by Chic</a>. </span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I got introduced to disco funk this year and it changed my life. </span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">
Disco music lyrics are profound if you really listen to them. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I dislike people who dramatize issues. </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Just say it like it is, dammit! <br />
</span><br />
<div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br />There are Boys. And there are Men. And then there is Boysz II Men. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">What impresses in a guy is boldness and clarity of thought. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">
I've realised that those two are closely interlinked. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Some men can really pull off beards. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">There are too many people prying into other people's lives on social media. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I'm one of them. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I prefer American spelling to British when it comes to z's but I can't stand color. </span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">
Not using punctuation makes me feel like an editorial rebel oh the joy </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I want to grow lots of plants. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I talk to the plants I currently have. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I want to have a pet cow. </span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I want to memorize the Chicago Manual of Style. </span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I just cannot get myself to kill a mosquito; I will hide under the sheets but I just cannot kill it with my bare hands.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">This year I met someone who influenced, revamped and almost completely changed my way of thinking. That counts for something...</span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I've got a checklist of trains I need to take.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I like going to places alone. <br />I like walking alone on busy streets. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I admire people who can make quick and firm decisions. </span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I admire people who can stick to a decision, even if I think the decision is wrong. </span>
</div>
</div>
<div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I am constantly surprised at how bitchy women can be, especially groups of women.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">When I'm extremely suspicious about something, there usually is reason to be. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I trust my instinct. </span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Many things in life are about the right timing. </span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">
If you really want to do something, and you have the means to do it, do it now. <br /><br />A few worthwhile pieces of advice I heard this year: <br /><i>You don't have to tell everybody everything</i> -- during a game of Never Have I Ever, when I got a little too excited. </span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>Don't bring your emotional baggage from one relationship into another </i>-- when I did. </span>
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>Just listen to music and be happy</i> -- friend's advice on dealing with a bad <span class="il">day</span>. </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>Don't curse the hand that feeds you</i> -- overheard a rain-drenched parking lot boy saying this to another rain-drenched parking lot boy when he swore at his job.</span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><i>Don't give up without a fight</i> -- much-needed support from a dear friend over email. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I carry everything when I travel. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I live on lists. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">People say things all the time - you chose whether you let it affect you. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I've learnt to be picky about the things I worry about. <br />
I think I'm becoming meaner with age. </span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">If only I became leaner as well. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Me? Defensive? </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Don't get married until you want to get married to the person you want to get married to. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Dream big. </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">
</span>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Look after yourself. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Laugh a lot. When the wind changes, at least your face will be stuck looking happy. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The Western Ghats remain my favourite destination. </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">
</span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Put things in writing. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I'm simply awful at
remembering faces. I invited the office electrician to my cubicle to 'have a
chat' thinking he was my typesetter. He still looks at me expectantly
every time I run into him on the stairs. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I can't sit still. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Media has power. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I like big groups of people. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I love home parties. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I hate being called a cute comics girl. <br />
I'm not 'cute' and I'm not 'bubbly'. I'm a brooding artist. So there. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">My favourite movie of all time is still Kuch Kuch Hota Hai. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Checked shirts make me happy. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I
once went to a mall with a friend who picked clothes that fit me
perfectly - and I bought all of them a size bigger, much to her despair.
</span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">
I love going to the gym. It's a mental workout. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I want to draw and write for the rest of my life.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Sleep is a solution. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Our
driver is investing all his resources into educating his son
who wants to be an engineer. It is both heart-warming and heart-rending
to see. </span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">We can be oblivious to sacrifices that our parents make (as Indian kids especially). </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I'm always surprised to find that there is still an ABBA song
I don't know in spite of having devotedly listened to them for most of
my childhood. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I want to do up a house from scratch one <span class="il">day</span>. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Life is short - give and live whole-heartedly. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Eat those apples, take your vitamins and be healthy. </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">
</span>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have learnt to forgive and let go, one of the hardest lessons I learnt this year. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Okay, I'm still learning. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I found my way around on two wheels this year. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Four wheels happening soon. </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">
</span>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I would like to learn an Indian classical instrument. </span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I'm adamant. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I dislike watching movies most of the time unless it's a movie I pick. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">That meaning of that dislikable word, prioritize, makes a lot of sense. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I have trouble doing pedicures - I feel like apologising every time someone touches my feet. </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">
</span>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Showers, hot or cold, bring rationale to me. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">No matter how much you edit, there will always be that teeny thing you missed out. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I love to sing. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I'm switching to drinking only wine. </span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Girl friends are irreplaceable. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Oranges are my favourite fruit.<br />Being single can be exhilarating. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Being in love can be steadying. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I am incredibly grateful for the people around me. </span>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I am touched by all the love. It's overwhelming. <br />I sound like MJ now. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I dislike living alone. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I've been told I'm a difficult person to live with.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">
</span>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I'm a walky talky bunch of contradictions and I think that gets on everybody's nerves. </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">26 is going to be amazing. </span><br />
<div class="yj6qo ajU">
<div class="ajR" data-tooltip="Show trimmed content" id=":2ji" role="button" tabindex="0">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><img class="ajT" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/images/cleardot.gif" /></span></div>
</div>
</div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-50870165736426219122013-10-27T19:51:00.000+05:302018-11-16T04:21:25.826+05:30MySpace<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">It is when I listen to George Benson while cutting tomatoes, frying onions and learning how to fold tortillas from a YouTube video in an empty house that I feel like I am in a space where nobody can touch me. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After three days of PMSing and feeling hopeful, sad, relieved and heartbroken all at the same time I spent a blissful Sunday evening cooking. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">I usually have three ways of dealing with stress - taking a shower, walking and cleaning. Showering works particularly when I'm angry - I feel the water running down from my hair to my toes takes away stored thoughts and emotions and preps me to start afresh. Toss in a strong, <i>violent</i> shower gel and that'll keep me going for weeks. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Walking, of course, is a form of meditation in itself. There are few things I like more than the mindless movement of my legs, one after another, in a continuous, lulling motion. In Vellore, my walks were my manna - my secret escapades into paddy fields and places undiscovered. I walked in rubber chappals and old clothes that had were torn and dotted with holes from thorn bushes I'd inadvertently walk into. In a city, I do the city thing - walk briskly in big shoes with my ipod plugged into my ears with the volume on ridiculous levels. Inside the joggers' park, there are usually too many people walking in a limited space -- too many calves in a blur in front of me -- some salwar-clad, some plump, some hairy, some toned and muscular. Too many ambling groups of people blocking the path, so I have to clear my throat loudly so that they move and give me space to proceed. So I find it easier to walk outside the park, where I encounter the daily dogs and uncles and aunties, with an exchange of friendly waves and nods spreading the much-needed morning warmth. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">And then sometimes I clean. Re-arranging books, scrubbing the carpet, washing clothes, all with loud music on makes me feel like I'm ridding the world of some of its sins. I clean with a vengeance. I clean like the PM's coming to visit. I iron my shirts keeping symmetry in mind. Oh cleaning is something I do rarely, but when I do it, I go all out. And so at least once in ten days I put my mind, body and soul into bringing law and order into my otherwise chaotic universe. What a joy it can be.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Cooking is the new activity I've taken to recently. Today, after a particularly irritating day and a terrible backache, I walked to Ratnadeep (a store where I can spend hours and hours picking veggies and breads). After spending a considerable amount of time looking celery sticks, different brands of canned corn, hunting for extra black kohl (so I can step into my goth look next week), and wondering what Jockey undies are doing next to the utensils section, I walked out in a daze. At home, I arranged my ingredients in the kitchen with a sort of reverence, plugged in George Benson with the volume on neighbours-are-gonna-call levels, and set about spraying my pan with olive oil and sauteing my veggies. I dumped - no, I <i>placed</i> the tortillas on a microwave plate and meanwhile, looked at a hundred videos of how to fold tortillas. Having got it right the first time, I took photos of the second time and sent it to various people expectantly. Maybe I overdid it and sent too many pics because nobody replied. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">But who cares? I cooked. I de-stressed. I Grooved to Georgie. It was an evening bloody well spent. And now to tuck into the tortilla-frankie-burrito-creations with mother and watch Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani on TV.</span><br />
</div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-80569209888988032902013-10-21T16:24:00.000+05:302020-01-04T00:26:23.455+05:30Gah, as Mr Goon would say <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="gmail_default" style="display: inline; font-family: trebuchet ms,sans-serif;">
I've been editing a book of stories about
successful entrepreneurs and the wonderful, meaningful work they're
doing, how they're impacting and changing lives and what not. It's full
of oh-so-inspirational messages to budding entrepreneurs about following
your dream and cliched junk like that. It makes me want to get off my
ass and do it all at once, so I suppose the cliched junk is working.<br />
<div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I
read a Hindi essay in school in which the author talks about 'drawing
room heroes'. The concept of a drawing room hero is about one who sits
in front of the TV and watches these amazing things people are doing out
there and says "whoa! I'm gonna do just that!" and is inspired as long
as he's in the 'drawing room', but by the time he walks to another room in his
house, the feeling fades. Not the best explanation, but you get what I
mean. And it applies to me too: by the time I get home nowadays, dream or no dream, I really want to just sleep. </div>
<div>
<br />
Sometimes I
question my worth and what I'm doing and where the hell I'm heading and
when I am going to "get there". What is this Tap basin sink etc. <br />
<br />
Must get back to that Karmanye Vadhikaraste business.</div>
I
fell face forward on the office stairs today and possess a swollen
thigh. Since this blog is turning out to be an angsty vent, why not add
the dear diary element to it?</div>
<div>
I've been going back to one of the stories to read this: <br />
<i><br /></i>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-autospace: none;">
<i><span style="font-family: "times new roman"; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;">Having a vision is essential: it should be a vision that
is subject to adjustment in the face of a changing environment. Goals, on the
other hand, remain constant, a<b>s does the work
essential to achieve those goals</b>.</span></i></div>
<br />
Dammit dammit dammit! </div>
</div>
</div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-79128926893670618132013-10-20T14:18:00.004+05:302020-01-04T00:25:01.900+05:30profound<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="gmail_default" style="display: inline; font-family: trebuchet ms,sans-serif;">
When you really want <span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">someplace else</span>, <span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;">here</span> is shoved right into your face. </div>
</div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-23754320376244936312013-10-17T22:31:00.001+05:302020-01-04T00:24:55.499+05:30Lyrical <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">I've
known some songs forever and ever but I've never bothered to listen to their
lyrics properly. Once in a while, the words of a song will suddenly make
themselves heard. Here are some lyrics that spoke to me of late. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"><br />
1.<i> Oo, loneliness will blind you <br />
In between the wrong and the right </i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">-One of
these nights, Eagles <i> </i></span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">I always
sang it as: </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">Oo,
loneliness will find you <br />
In between the wrong and the right </span></i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">which I
think makes more sense to me. I think both hold true. </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"><br />
2. More wisdom. </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">I guess
every form of refuge has its price</span></i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"> -</span></i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">Lyin' eyes, Eagles</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">3. This
one has to be the one I worked hardest at "by-hearting" and singing
along with when I was in school. And only now I realise what they're saying.
Super funky lyrics. The rest of the song is pretty awesome too.</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">...And I
am taken to a place where<br />
Your crystal mind and<br />
Magenta feelings take up shelter<br />
In the base of my spine... </span></i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">-</span></i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">I want you, Savage
Garden </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">4. The
next one is bloody corny, yet so romantic. One of their best songs. </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">I am the
man<br />
who loves you inside and out<br />
backwards and forwards with<br />
my heart hanging out</span></i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">-Love you
inside out, Bee Gees</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">5.
Kickass song, and what an intro. </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">Oh what a
feeling I get when I'm with you<br />
You take my heart into everything you do </span></i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">- Bad
love, Eric Clapton </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">6. A
reminder, no matter how cliched, we all need. Probably one of the catchiest,
best sing-along choruses ever.</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">So
tonight gotta leave that nine to five upon the shelf<br />
And just enjoy yourself<br />
Groove, let the madness in the music get to you<br />
Life ain't so bad at all</span></i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">- Off the
wall, MJ </span></i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">7. A
reminder of a different kind. </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">We're
looooooost in the middle of a hopeless world</span></i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">-Children
of the Moon, Alan Parsons Project </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">8. I like
how disco music has quite brilliant lyrics if only you stop to listen to
it. </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"><br />
<i>Now you've got yours</i></span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">What
about me? </span></i><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">-What
about me, Chic </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"><br />
<i>To keep in touch<br />
All you need is love and music<br />
To keep you satisfied please use it</i></span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">-We got
music, Incognito </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"><br />
------------------------------------------</span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;">It's
really all in the way they're sung. </span><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , "sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN-SG; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-SG;"></span></div>
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Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-44904172915345323112013-02-21T23:34:00.002+05:302018-11-16T04:21:25.755+05:30a childhood made of dreams<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">I
don't know where my parents procured the Magic Toothbrush from, but it
remains, to this day, the single most fascinating thing I have ever seen
in my life. My brother and I woke up one day to find that we had just
willed the 'changing colour' toothbrush to jump straight out of the TV
ad into our hands. We carefully filled a mug full of hot water and
dipped the brushes in it, waiting in anticipation. And sure enough, the
purple toothbrush turned into a blush of pink and my brother's red into a
happy yellow. (<i>Ei my colour is better!</i>, I told him triumphantly.)</span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br />And so every morning we spent a considerable amount of time dipping
the toothbrushes in hot water, waiting for them to change colour, and
watching them gradually fade back to their original colours while we
brushed. In the household's morning madness of
only-one-hour-running-water, dubbas to be packed and tiffins to be
carried, the event of brushing our teeth suddenly assumed prime
importance. </span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">We were fortunate enough to live just across the street from Walden,
one of Hyderabad's best-loved bookstores, and next to Prime Time,' the
dashing-car place'. And of course, we were fortunate enough to have
parents who walked us across that street. Baker's Inn was a stone's
throw away, and soon, Pizza Inn, one of Hyderabad's first pizza outlets
came up behind it. <i>There's a secret underground passage between the two</i>, my brother told me, in hushed tones. <i>Only I know about it. I'll take you some day. </i>He never did.</span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">I worshipped my brother for many years of my childhood. He was So Cool. He taught me to blow Big Babol <i>bubblinggum</i>
bubbles. He read to me every night the abridged version of Count of
Monte Cristo (which, for the longest time, I called CountayMontay
Cristo). He took me on bike rides. He was Star Swimmer in Secunderabad
Club, another place which adopted us when we were kids. He could do
Scary Folded Eyelids. He taught me to play book cricket and 'house, hut,
palace'. He got home tamarind seeds from his school, and I rubbed them
against each other all day, trying to make a fire. He taught me swear
words (unintentionally). But his Hero status ended abruptly, when, one
night, I was woken up by a ghostly, ghastly apparition hovering over me,
moving its pseudopodia-like arms about furiously.<i> BOOOOOO</i>, it rumbled at me menacingly. <i>AAAAAAHHH!!</i>,
I screamed. When my parents pulled the bedsheet off his face, I went to
bed furious, resolving to be a better judge of character in future.</span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br />And then there was the Curious Case of the Cupboard Cricket. A
Godrej almirah stood like a morose sentinel in the room that my brother
and I shared. Every night it would emit a series of shrill chirps,
following which Anna would give it a bang, and the noise would stop.
After five minutes, it would start again. What is this cricket? I asked
my mom. She said it was a harmless insect. I rummaged about at the back
of the cupboard one day trying to find it. I had (thankfully) never seen
a cricket before. (The sight of crickets today makes me jump like I'm
one of their own.) I didn't find the insect, but I found an old giant
pop-up birthday card instead.</span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Pop-up cards were something. So were yo-yos. So were my dad's
beautiful letterhead papers that he carefully brought for me from
various hotels that he stayed in. And then there were my mom's cakes.
And Diwali sweets. And Holi pitchkaris. And notebook labels with
cartoons on them. Balloons from Tank Bund were a special treat. And
Lucky Dips. And cups I would fill with soap water and blow bubbles out
of with a straw (I later graduated, with the help of the maid, to
blowing rin soap bubbles right off my hand). Santa came to Walden every
Christmas. The annual house-washing event was also looked forward to
with enthusiasm because the soapy floor favoured skating adventures. </span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Summers were spent in my grandparents' place in Gujarat, where my
cousins and I grew up eating mangoes, getting into neighbourhood fights,
adopting street cows and generally having a notoriously gala time. We
slept on the terrace on rajais, after having had puri-Shrikhand and
having listened to my uncle's bedtime stories under the night sky. My
grandfather was a great storyteller too - tales of the Trojan horse,
anecdotes from the Mahabharat, quotes from Wodehouse, his own
experiences as a teacher. In Chennai, another uncle, a sailor, told me
stories of his travels, of ships and whales and tornados, and I waited
patiently for an octopus to show up in them. A older cousin once came
home and taught us to make boats of paper and camphor and float them in
our bath buckets. </span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">School was an altogether strange and surreal world. Maria placed
cracker (balsam) seeds on her tongue, upon which they exploded. She
could also walk on her hands. It was my dream to excel in similar feats.
There were skeletons in the lab (that came alive at night with glowing
red eyes) and crocodiles in the drain. There was piano class, where you
could open up a piano to see the hammers hitting the strings. SUPW
taught us to make jumping frogs out of paper. There was groupism and tree-climbing and ice-cream uncle and there
were fights and tears and iodine knees. There were competitions and
choir practice and dramatics (where I appointed myself as pianist for
fear of being made an inanimate object). </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br />Out of school hours, I was made, like many other kids, to learn
Bharatnatyam and Carnatic music. When I hit a couple of notes on the
Casio, my parents enrolled me for piano lessons. I made a get-well-soon
card for my brother with a pig's face on it - and this, taken to be the
sign of a budding artist - prompted my parents to send me to a variety
of art and craft classes. And so I learnt to stitch odd-looking soft
toys, paint on glass, mould pots and flowers from POP, pencil-sketch,
carve sola wood, make gift boxes, write calligraphy, and what not. Happy
with the fruits of their encouragement, my parents tried badminton and
tennis on me but soon discovered that I was a lazy lump of lard. I did
enjoy periodically poking the touch-me-nots growing by the court,
though. </span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">We also travelled quite a bit, during which the family transformed
into a bunch of jokers. My dad worried about shower pressure in hotels.
My mother worried about wild animals and about my brother, who went Too
Close to Edges. I gambolled along gaily. In Hyderabad, we went annually
to the P C Sorcar magic show and to my favourite childhood haunt, the
Birla Science Museum and Planetarium. Trips to Softy Den and Pick N Move
spelt Heaven. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Looking back, I feel that in more ways than many,
exposure just landed on my plate. The simplest of simple things made a
difference. Sometimes, my mother would deliver the love in the form of
two dots and a smile of
ketchup on a round uttappam. My parents, brother, grandparents,
aunts, uncles, cousins, neighbours, teachers at school, teachers at
various hobby classes, school friends, hobby-class friends, parents of
friends, maids,
drivers, watchmen, other apartment inhabitants, grocery shop uncles -
everyone played an exclusive role in gifting me a glorious, magical,
happy childhood. A childhood that is tangible when I rub two tamarind
seeds against each other and press them on my palm, feeling the sweet,
familiar
thrill of their warmth. </span></div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37556862.post-81627142800877312442013-01-10T22:31:00.002+05:302018-11-16T04:21:26.020+05:30finding my tongue<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="ajy">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><img alt="" class="ajz" data-tooltip="Show details" id=":1xa" role="button" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/u/0/images/cleardot.gif" tabindex="0" /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">When
I was a kid, music was my thing. When someone asked me what my hobby
was, I said "playing the piano". When asked what I liked to do in my
free time I said "I play the piano". I was the kid who bunked sports to
go sit at rusty pianos in a musty, dark room. I was subsequently
punished for bunking throwball. I knelt on a tar field, tears streaming
down my face, not because of humiliation, but because I wanted to <i>go back and continue playing</i>.
I was never a performer. I managed to pass a few Trinity grades, but I
disliked being asked to play for an audience. I was happy when I was
alone with a piano, both of us isolated, cocooned warmly by the
knowledge that nobody would come by for a long time. <br />
<br />That was a good fifteen years ago. <br /><br />Things are the same
today. I have never been a band person. I'm still not much of a
performer though I like having someone to sing. I'm a pathetic jammer.
But now, I don't find the contentment I used to. Playing music has
become less of a vent and more of a bother. I think it's because I <i>understand</i>
more now. Had I not started listening to Keith Jarret or Chick Corea, I
would've been a happier person as a musician. I would've strung a bunch
of chords together and been content. But now, I <i>know </i>what I want
something to sound like, and I can't get that sound out of my system.
And I want to spare myself from my own audience. <br />
<br />It is frustrating to be able to understand something and be unable
to reproduce it. It also frustrating that what you once thought you were
a natural at suddenly seems alien. I hate having to make an effort to
play music. <i>Just be free</i>, they say. <i>Let go. </i>At which point I let my fingers wander over the
notes aimlessly, modulating, dying into meaninglessness. <br />
<br />Translating abstract into words, verse and sentences is different. I
get a kick out of writing exactly what's in my head. It satisfies,
encourages, absorbs, relieves. I don't have a role model to follow. I
just sit down and talk. I see a picture in my head and I can repaint it
exactly the same way without using visuals. I feel a feeling and I can
recreate that feeling - or at least, the memory of it. I don't have to
try to be good, or try to be interesting. I don't write for a reader. I
don't have to try. The ease of expression is liberating. <br />
<br />Writing is my thing. </span></div>
Ramyahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11463894001297755306noreply@blogger.com0